


#GetJoshABoyfriend

by Fe_yre



Category: Bandom, Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, Panic! at the Disco, Twenty One Pilots
Genre: AU, F/F, F/M, Gay, Halsey is always late, M/M, Multi, Patrick is innocent bean, but also there's some other stuff, everyone and their brother has done this but I'm doing it too fight me okay, group chat au, i apologise in advance, i wasn't expecting this to be so popular, its what you would excpect from a bandom groupchat, joshler - Freeform, pretty much focused on Joshler, some swearing cause Brendon Urie obviously, very gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-28
Updated: 2016-07-14
Packaged: 2018-07-18 19:18:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 77
Words: 15,514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7327048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fe_yre/pseuds/Fe_yre
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Group chat AU that everyone has done except now it's mine. Focused mainly on Joshler but some other stuff too. I mean honestly it's called the sin tin do you really want to miss out on this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just to be clear even though it's pretty self-explanatory:  
> Brendon Urie: BEE/NO  
> Ryan Ross: RyRo  
> Dallon Weekes: Weekely  
> Josh Dun: SpookyJimChristmas  
> Patrick Stump: Hatrick  
> Pete Wentz: RestInPete  
> Gerard Way: MilkFriend  
> Halsey: Iamhalsey
> 
> As characters are added/ names are changed; I'll keep you updated.

[BEE/NO has added Ryro, Weekely, Hatrick, RestInPete, SpookyJimChristmas, Iamhalsey, and MilkFriend to the group: "Don't Make Me Turn This Car Around"]

[5:32 PM]

BEE/NO: HELLO CHILDREN

Ryro: Oh my god 

Hatrick: Brendon why

RestInPete: I would rather be anywhere besides in this chat 

BEE/NO: Pete you're hurting my heart

SpookyJimChristmas: What heart?

Ryro: why is every letter of this group chat's name capitalised?

Ryro: Who are you, Jaden Smith?

BEE/NO: I'm a capitalist 

[Ryro has left the chat]

 

[Ryro has been added by BEE/NO]

BEE/NO: Excuse me u can't just leave and ignore my great joke

[BEE/NO has changed the group name to JadenSmithAesthetic]

MilkFriend: Why is this a thing that's happening 

BEE/NO: Because I, as the wonderful person I am, have decided to make this and get you all laid. 

SpookyJimChristmas: Pass, Ryan and Dallon can have you. 

Ryro: how dare??

BEE/NO: Stfu Josh you need to get laid the most out of everyone 

Weekely: #GetJoshABoyfriend

SpookyJimChristmas: no

Ryro: #GetJoshABoyfriend

SpookyJimChristmas: guys

MilkFriend: #OrAtLeastAFuckBuddy

SpookyJimChristmas: gUYS

Hatrick: Josh I thought you were married to your drums

SpookyJimChristmas: I AM

BEE/NO: NOT FOR LONG. SUBJECT 1: Joshua William Dun, in need of boy (or girl but let's be honest, boy). GOT IT. ILL FIND SOMEONE

SpookyJimChristmas: BRENDON

Ryro: Your middle name is William?

RestInPete: shut up Ryan. Need we remind you of your full name? 

[Ryro changed their name to RyanWilliamDun]

SpookyJimChristmas: WOW RUDE

[SpookyJimChristmas changed their name to JoshGeorgeIII]

[RyanWilliamDun changed their name to RyRo]

RyRo: okay never mind. 

[JoshGeorgeIII changed their name to SpookyJimChristmas]

SpookyJimChristmas: That's what I thought. 

Iamhalsey: Guys I'm late

BEE/NO: Finally 

Iamhalsey: it's fine I read back. I'm all caught up. 

BEE/NO: Your input?

Iamhalsey: #GetJoshABoyfriend

SpookyJimChristmas: OH MY GOD


	2. Gerald and R-Dog

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan just really wants to fight Gerard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I think you understand.   
> Frank is Frankenfurter  
> Brendon changed his name from BEE/NO to BreadBowl  
> Josh changes from SpookyJimChristmas to SpookyJimRIPPEDmas

[7:32 PM]

MilkFriend: Guys wait why isn't Frank here?

RyRo: no smh keep your gay shit out of this chat

MilkFriend: What

Weekely: Ryan you're literally the gayest here

RyRo: no I'm not 

BEE/NO: I beg to differ

Hatrick: OHHHHHH DRAMAAAAAA

RestInPete: ROMANCEEEEEE

MilkFriend: okay so

[MilkFriend has added Frankenfurter to the chat]

SpookyJimChristmas: FRANKENFURTER

Frankenfurter: stfu you're name is a lie you aren't called Jim. I swear to god I'll fight the shit out of you.

SpookyJimChristmas: Wow I feel ATTACKED 

Weekely: RIP

BEE/NO: dude have you seen Josh's arms? You'd lose in seconds. 

Weekely: no no wait, more like RIPPED 

[SpookyJimChristmas has changed their name to SpookyJimRIPPEDmas]

Frankenfurter: no Brendon I'm not constantly checking people out unlike you

RyRo: So are we just ignoring that Josh made the worst pun ever

RyRo: Actually it's not even a pun it's wordplay. 

RestInPete: Damn why are you in such a bad mood Frank calm down 

RyRo: Guess so 

Frankenfurter: I came here to have a good time

Hatrick: FRANK NO

RestInPete: DON'T

Frankenfurter: and I'm honestly feeling so attacked rn

MilkFriend: I regret my decision 

Hatrick: Get me out of this sin tin

[BEE/NO has changed the group name to SIN TIN]

Weekely: BRENDON YOU BREAD BOWL STOP CHANGING THE NAME 

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: Bread

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: Bowl

[BEE/NO has changed their name to BreadBowl]

BreadBowl: I love it 

Iamhalsey: Guys I'm late again 

BreadBowl: your input this time?

Iamhalsey: BreadBowl suits you

Weekely: I agree

RyRo: I feel like BreadBin is better

RestInPete: Who puts their bread in a bin?

Hatrick: WHO PUTS THEIR BREAD IN A BOWL

Iamhalsey: that's not what a bread bowl is

MilkFriend: Ryan's just jealous that Dallon gave Brendon a nickname 

RyRo: OKAY LISTEN HERE GERALD

MilkFriend: my name is nOT GERALD

RyRo: ARE YOU TRYING TO FIGHT ME GERANIUM 

MilkFriend: I AM OFFENDED

Frankenfurter: you can't fight Gee he's too precious. 

MilkFriend: I have soft hands 

RyRo: DONT TALK SHIT IF U CANT TAKE A HIT

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: I want that on a shirt

Hatrick: Josh you don't even cuss what are you talking about

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: yes I do

RestInPete: Frick doesn't count 

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: never mind

RyRo: Don't talk frick if u can't take a hit

MilkFriend: Why can't you spell you right?

RyRo: WE JUST WENT OVER THIS GEMMEL. STOP TRYING TO FIGHT ME. 

MilkFriend: GEMMEL

RyRo: WHAT YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY GERTRUDE

BreadBowl: RYAN STOP TRYING TO FIGHT GERARD SPELL HIS NAME RIGHT

RyRo: I REFUSE

MilkFriend: That's okay Ryden I understand 

RyRo: what

MilkFriend: What's wrong Ryler

RyRo: stop

MilkFriend: Am I upsetting you R-Dog

RyRo: GERARD

MilkFriend: Thanks Ryan 

Hatrick: OHHHHH SASSMASTER GEE

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: I'm so proud


	3. A disgrace to the Lenny face

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poor Josh

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Josh changes from SpookyJimRIPPEDmas to SpookyJimRIPmas

[6:02 PM]

BreadBowl: JOSHHHHUAAAAAA

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: ...

BreadBowl: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: I'm too uncomfortable to reply to that. 

BreadBowl: WHOS THE BOY I SAW YOU WALKING WITH EARLIERRRRR 

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: OH MY GOD

MilkFriend: SPILL

SpookyJimChristmas: It was literally just a boy I was getting homework from

BreadBowl: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: Brendon I'm serious

BreadBowl: ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉)

RyRo: WHAT DID YOU DO TO IT. 

BreadBowl: I'd like a name Josh 

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: why does it matter

BreadBowl: Because he was hot you two could ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉)

RyRo: STOP USING THAT ITS A DISGRACE TO THE LENNY FACE. 

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: Literally I probably won't talk to him again after this. I was only getting homework. 

BreadBowl: Then giving me his name shouldn't matter 

Iamhalsey: Hey Josh did you get the homework from Tyler? 

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: HALSEY IM 

BreadBowl: WE GOT FIRST NAME BASIS PEOPLE

Iamhalsey: What's happening? 

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: BRENDON IS TRYING TO SHIP ME WITH TYLER. DO NOT TELL HIM HIS LAST NAME. PLEASE. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. 

Iamhalsey: well

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: I swear to god 

Iamhalsey: you guys did have some pretty intense eye contact going on. 

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: I WAS GETTING. HOMEWORK. 

RestInPete: Guys I just woke up what's happening 

RyRo: Pete it's six in the evening?

RestInPete: Time isn't real

BreadBowl: JOSH WAS FLIRTING WITH A MYSTERY BOY NAMED TYLER. BUT HE'S DENYING IT. 

RestInPete: I don't think I know anyone named Tyler to be honest. 

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: THANK GOD

BreadBowl: Halsey if you tell I'll invite that girl you like to my party next week 

Iamhalsey: I am intrigueddddd

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: OUR FRIENDSHIP IS ON THE LINE HERE. 

BreadBowl: And you can be in charge of the music for the whole night. 

Iamhalsey: Josh pleaseeeee

[SpookyJimRIPPEDmas has removed Iamhalsey from the chat.]

[BreadBowl has added Iamhalsey to the group]

Iamhalsey: WOW 

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: I will cry 

Hatrick: Are we talking about Tyler Joseph?

[SpookyJimRIPPEDmas has left the chat]

BreadBowl: OH MY GOD PATRICK I LOVE YOU

BreadBowl: #GETJOSHABOYFRIEND MAY BE REAL GUYS

[BreadBowl has added SpookyJimRIPPEDmas to the chat]

SpookyJimRIPPEDmas: I am going to kill myself 

[SpookyJimRIPPEDmas has changed their name to SpookyJimRIPmas]

BreadBowl: I shall be researching for the rest of the night. No one bother me. 

RyRo: Researching what?

BreadBowl: ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉)

RyRo: GOD DAMMIT


	4. Go the fuck to sleep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> V short peterick moment I guess?

[3:12 AM]

Hatrick: So did I do something wrong or? I'm still lost 

RestInPete: Patrick it's 3 in the morning

Hatrick: I've been worried about it

RestInPete: It's fine you didn't know what was happening 

Hatrick: Are you sure?

RestInPete: I'm sure don't worry

MilkFriend: You two are so cute 

Frankenfurter: Go the fuck to sleep


	5. PatrickWEEDLEAF

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dun dun dun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brendon changes from BreadBowl to Brendank
> 
> Patrick changes from Hatrick to PatrickWEEDLEAF

[4:20 PM]

[BreadBowl has changed their name to Brendank]

Brendank: Ayeeeee 420

Weekely: Brendon your mom doesn't even let you out after 11 you don't smoke 

Brendank: oR dO i 

[Hatrick has changed their name to PatrickWEEDLEAF]

RestInPete: Patrick 

MilkFriend: That was a good try

Frankenfurter: weed leaf. 

RyRo: Patrick, sweetie no

Weekely: Patrick have you ever even seen a joint

Brendank: it's a good name idk what you guys are talking about. 

Brendank: right Josh?

SpookyJimRIPmas: I don't have any comment on the situation. 

RyRo: Josh you're still mad? 

PatrickWEEDLEAF: I'm sorry Josh

SpookyJimRIPmas: rip

RestInPete: literally there's no staying mad at Patrick. You can't do it. 

SpookyJimRIPmas: I'm not mad at Patrick. 

PatrickWEEDLEAF: okay good

SpookyJimRIPmas: I'm mad at Brendon 

Brendank: WOW WHAT DID I DO

SpookyJimRIPmas: I REFUSED TO ANSWER YOUR CALLS EARLIER SO YOU HID IN THE BUSHES OUTSIDE MY HOUSE AND ATTACKED ME WHEN I CAME OUTSIDE

Brendank: That's your fault entirely for going outside 

SpookyJimRIPmas: WHAT

Weekely: why were you refusing to answer his calls?

SpookyJimRIPmas: rip

RyRo: you're such a drama queen Josh

Brendank: That reminds me actually 

[Brendank has added TylerNOseph to the chat]


	6. TylerNOseph

[4:42 PM]

Brendank: Now we wait

RyRo: Josh are u ok

[SpookyJimRIPmas removed themself from the chat]

MilkFriend: Brendon look what you did 

Brendank: Me?? How dare??

TylerNOseph: so... can I ask why I was added to this.. or..???

Brendank: WELCOME TO THE SIN TIN TYLER JOSEPH

PatrickWEEDLEAF: YEAH THE SIN TIN

RestInPete: This whole thing is a train wreck I'm so sorry that you have to witness this Tyler 

Frankenfurter: WAIT YOUR LAST NAME IS JOSEPH AND YOU CHANGED IT TO NOSEPH?

TylerNOseph: puns are life man

Frankenfurter: HE CAN STAY

Brendank: Tyler do you want to come to the party I'm having next weekend?

TylerNOseph: dude do I know any of you

PatrickWEEDLEAF: You know me Tyler

TylerNOseph: Patrick why... Weed leaf

Brendank: you also know Halsey right? And Josh Dun?

Brendank: Joshua William Dun

Brendank: Josh 

TylerNOseph: I wasn't aware of his middle name, but yeah I know him. 

Brendank: great then it's all settled. You know three people. Nice to meet you I'm Brendon. There's four. Are you coming?

TylerNOseph: I guess?

PatrickWEEDLEAF: YEAH!! THE SIN TIN GETS A SEQUEL. 

RestInPete: Patrick calm down

[Brendank has added SpookyJimRIPmas to the chat]

[SpookyJimRIPmas has changed their name to DunWithYou]

Brendank: Josh you're coming to the party. You have to so Tyler knows four people. 

DunWithYou: Only if I'm allowed to use the drumset in the basement. 

Brendank: fine 

TylerNOseph: Drums? Sick. 

MilkFriend: OTP. HE SAID SICK. 

TylerNOseph: What?

Frankenfurter: IGNORE HIM.


	7. Stumped

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brendon changes from Brendank to Brendork
> 
> Patrick changes from PatrickWEEDLEAF to Stumped

[1:42 PM]

Brendank: Ryan

RyRo: What

Brendank: What are you doing

RyRo: Are u fucking kidding me right now 

Brendank: Ryan

Weekely: Brendon we are all literally in the gym. We are actively in an assembly. 

Brendank: Where are you guys?

Weekely: no stay where you are

PatrickWEEDLEAF: We're all at the back of the gym 

RestInPete: well not ALL of us

PatrickWEEDLEAF: yeah Brendork, Halsey and Tyler aren't here. Josh is here he's just refusing to answer anyone. 

[Brendank has changed their name to Brendork]

Brendork: Be right there

PatrickWEEDLEAF: Wait I can't handle the pressure of being the only one with a name like this

PatrickWEEDLEAF: WHAT DO I CHAMGE IT TO

PatrickWEEDLEAF: GUESS IM REALLY  
[PatrickWEEDLEAF has changed their name to Stumped]

RestInPete: no one say anything about it. Don't encourage him. 

TylerNOseph: I applaud him. Last name game high five

TylerNOseph: that also applies to Josh

MilkFriend: OTPOTPOTP

TylerNOseph: what does that mean. Are you okay 

Frankenfurter: SOOO TYLER WHERE ARE YOU

TylerNOseph: I'm behind you guys I've been standing back here the whole time. 

RyRo: spoOOOOKY

Brendork: Tyler come sit with me lets have a chat

Weekely: Brendon if you ever said that to me I'd run away as fast as possible 

TylerNOseph: it's fine I'll just sit on the other side 

RyRo: Josh where are you going 

DunWithYou: RIP

DunWithYou: that stands for Ryan, I'm peeing.

TylerNOseph: is

TylerNOseph: is that word play dude that's awesome

DunWithYou: thank u I am a legend 

Frankenfurter: Gee don't you dare say anything 

MilkFriend: o

RyRo: Josh come back

DunWithYou: I'm peeling calm down I wasn't lying 

MilkFriend: t

Frankenfurter: I swear to god Gerard

RyRo: if the assembly starts and you aren't here you'll get in trouble 

DunWithYou: IT DOESNT TAKE ME THAT LONG TO PEE IM ALREADY ON THE WAY BACK

MilkFriend: p

TylerNOseph: Is anyone going to tell me what that means or is that just his thing 

Brendork: Tyler switch me places so I can sit next to Josh when he comes back

TylerNOseph: Excuse U I don't take orders 

RestInPete: Frank give Gerard his phone back

Frankenfurter: No you know what he's going to do.


	8. OTP

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gerard changes from MilkFriend to OTP

[6:22 PM]

TylerNOseph: Jish what are you doing 

TylerNOseph: Josh. I meant Josh sorry. 

DunWithYou: what do you mean

TylerNOseph: I'm walking home and I can see you laying in the grass. 

DunWithYou: What

TylerNOseph: I'm like six feet away from you Put your phone down

MilkFriend: OTP

Frankenfurter: GEE I WILL SCALP YOU SHUT UP

Brendork: Is it happening 

Stumped: Is what happening 

RestInPete: SHHHH I'll tell you later 

Iamhalsey: Guys calm down

RyRo: You finally answered

Iamhalsey: I'm a busy person okay

RyRo: Busy with what

RyRo: don't answer that actually

Weekely: Hey why aren't Tyler and Josh answering anymore. 

[MilkFriend has changed their name to OTP]

OTP: *SCREECHES*

Frankenfurter: OH MY GOD

RyRo: but seriously tho where'd they go

Brendork: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 

Iamhalsey: Brendon stop 

Stumped: Josh is an innocent child leave him alone


	9. Harassment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brendon changes from Brendork to Brendick
> 
> Tyler changes from TylerNOseph to InnocentBean

[8:31 PM]

TylerNOseph: Jish are you still coming to my house tomorrow?

TylerNOseph: I meant Josh

Brendork: WHAT

DunWithYou: Yeah do you want me to bring anything

TylerNOseph: nah it's fine

Brendork: WHAT 

RyRo: Brendon shut up let the boy have his fun without judgement 

TylerNOseph: what are you talking about?

DunWithYou: YOU GUYS ARE SO GROSS IM GOING OVER TO HANG OUT

Brendork: to hang something

Weekely: EW 

DunWithYou: stop being a Brendick

RyRo: DID JOSH DUN JUST SAY DICK. WHAT HAS THE WORLD COME TO. 

[Brendork has changed their name to Brendick]

Brendick: I'm sure you know all about dicks Josh

TylerNOseph: in the week I've known Josh he's literally been the most innocent person I've met. Besides Patrick maybe 

DunWithYou: SEE TYLER IS SO NICE THATS WHY IM GOING TO HIS HOUSE AND NOT YOURS

Brendick: yea that's why, right Tyler? 

DunWithYou: Leave him alone. Tyler is an innocent bean

[TylerNOseph has changed their name to InnocentBean]

InnocentBean: Thank

Brendick: not gonna be innocent for much longer heyo 

RestInPete: brendon keep your fanfics to yourself please this is a sin free zone

[RestInPete has changed the group name to "Sin free sin tin"]

Brendick: that's a lot of sin for a sin free place. 

Frankenfurter: literally you're all the bad influence in this chat 

Brendick: I'm not the one calling people dicks

Brendick: #Josh

Stumped: no but you are harassing Tyler and Josh

OTP: yeah

Frankenfurter: Gee you have no argument your name literally harassed them 

Brendick: harASSment ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

OTP: It's not harassing them. It's encouragement. 

InnocentBean: yeah what does that mean by the way

Frankenfurter: Anyways


	10. Not so innocent bean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> S the day of the party

Brendick: Guys where are you the party is officially starting 

RyRo: I'm literally standing right next to you

Brendick: I wasn't talking about you

Weekely: I'm in the kitchen

Weekely: yams everywhere 

RestInPete: You did NOT 

Stumped: Did Dallon just quote 2chainz

Brendick: He's drunk let him be. Where are you two?

Stumped: We were the first ones here. We said hi to you rememeber?

Brendick: what. No I don't remember 

RyRo: wait I don't Remember that either 

Brendick: we haven't even had that much to drink. Shit. 

Stumped: I'm jk we're on the way

Brendick: Did Patrick just 

Iamhalsey: I came in through your backdoor

Brendick: how'd you get in my yard? 

Iamhalsey: your dog loves me

Brendick: why didn't you just come in through the front?

Iamhalsey: why would I?

Brendick: I guess

DunWithYou: I'm in front of your house, I had to ride my bike here. I should inform you that there are people on your roof

OTP: That'd be me 

OTP: I am people

RyRo: where'd Tyler go he was here I saw him

Weekely: He's in the kitchen with me he's quite the drinker you know that?

DunWithYou: YOU'RE GOING TO GIVE HIM ALCOHOL POISENING HE'S SMALL

Brendick: Not so innocent bean

DunWithYou: DALLON IM GONNA FIGHT YOU

DunWithYou: BRENDON UNLOCK THE DOOR 

Brendick: no

Brendick: WAIT JOSH NO

Brendick: JOSH 

Weekely: WHY DID JOSH JUST COME THROUGH THE KITCHEN WINDOW 

InnocentBean: oh hey Josh when did you get here?


	11. Aftermath

[2:43 AM]

RyRo: Dallon

Weekely: what 

RyRo: Get your fucking foot off of my face

Stumped: why didn't you just say it out loud? We're all laying on the floor

RyRo: someone might be asleep

RestInPete: I'm trying to sleep

Stumped: well rest in Pete. 

RestInPete: I'm leaving

Brendick: Guys you're all in my house on the floor? Why ami not there. What room are you guys in?

DunWithYou: I'm not sure if it's a room. Seems like more of a closet

InnocentBean: U right

Brendick: and where is Gerard and Frank

Brendick: WHY AM I THE ONE CHECKING ON EVERYONE

OTP: have Josh and Tylergotten married yet?

RyRo: Brendon wants to know where you are

OTP: I'm not sure. Maybe some bushes. 

Brendick: is everyone really that fucked up?

Stumped: Don't swear Brendon I'll tell ur mum

Brendick: what the fuck

OTP: so to answer my question?

InnocentBean: U right

InnocentBean: BAD TIMING

Iamhalsey: TYLER'S CONFIRMED IT. ITS REAL

DunWithYou: WHERE DID YOU COME FROM

Iamhalsey: ?

InnocentBean: spooky

Brendick: WHY ARE WE IGNORING THAT TYLER JUST SAID HE AND JOSH ARE MARRIED??? GERARD THIS YOUR TIME??

InnocentBean: IT WAS BAD TIMING I WAS JUST AGREEING WOTH PATRICK THAT YOU SHOULDN'T CUSS

Brendick: #Joshlerwedding

OTP: #Joshlerwedding

InnocentBean: Joshler? I don't understand

Iamhalsey: #Joshlerwedding

Stumped: He doesn't know what ship names are?

InnocentBean: ... Ship names? Why are we talking about boats now. 

DunWithYou: DONT TAINT HIS PURE MIND. 

RyRo: HES NOT PURE HES DRUNK AS FUCK AND HIS KNEE IS IN MY BACK

Weekely: Ryan calm down 

Brendick: oh no 

Weekely: RYAN WHAT ARE YOU DOING

InnocentBean: Ryan you got up so fast that was magical

Weekely: Brendon I am running through your house

Weekely: send help

RyRo: I'll show u calm. 

DunWithYou: oh no... Somebody help him.. 

Stumped: I can't. Pete is sleeping on my legs. 

InnocentBean: Josh where are you

DunWithYou: what are you talking about I'm sitting next to you. 

InnocentBean: o

Frankenfurter: OW WHAT THE FUCK DALLON

Frankenfurter: WHAT THE FUCK RYAN 

OTP: are u okay

Frankenfurter: I WAS GETTING DRINKS AND DALLON SUDDENDLY RAMS INTO ME AND RUNS AWAY, AND THEN RYAN DOES THE SAME THING I ALMOST DROPPED MY PHONE

Brendick: IF U FIGHT IN THE KITCHEN IM CALLING THE POLICE. 

Iamhalsey: They're in the yard I just saw them run past the window

OTP: BE CAREFUL DONT HURT ME IM IN THE BUSHES


	12. ProtectJosh2K16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tyler changed from InnocentBean to ProtectJosh2K16

[12:07 PM]

Brendick: Everyone got home okay, right?

RyRo: Brendon's the mom friend 

Brendick: I AM NOT YOU GUYS WERE JUST BEING SO RIDICULOIS I HAD TO TAKE CONTROL

Weekely: I'm fine but I have a bruise on my cheek 

RyRo: I wonder what you did. Gerard. Gerard are you okay? What about Frank? He's alright. Someone else answer please. Quickly. 

Weekely: what are you talking about Ryan?

OTP: Yeah I'm home I'm okay, Frank's here too

Brendick: oooohhhhhhh

OTP: IM GOING TO BLOCK YOU

InnocentBean: I made it home too I'm alright. 

Brendick: alone?

InnocentBean: yeah who would I be with?

DunWithYou: YEAH BRENDON IM STILL AT YOUR HOUSE WATCH YOURSELF

RestInPete: Has anyone heard from Patrick?

Brendick: He's sleeping in the lawn 

RestInPete: WHAT

Iamhalsey: I put a blanket on him before I left if that helps 

RestInPete: I'm coming to pick him up

DunWithYou: you don't drive Pete 

RestInPete: I do today. 

Weekely: BRENDON EVACUATE THE HOUSE. DO YOU HAVE INSURANCE. WILL A CAR THROUGH THE WALL BE COVERED

Brendick: IF U DRIVE THROUGH MY WALL IM GOING TO CUT UR HAIR WHILE YOU SLEEP PETE

RestInPete: Relax I'm almost there. No accidents yet. 

RyRo: PUT YOUR PHONE AWAY WHAT ARE YOU DOING

DunWithYou: if I get killed in this house I'm going to be pissed

InnocentBean: Pete don't kill Josh

[InnocentBean has changed their name to ProtectJosh2K16]

OTP: aw

ProtectJosh2K16: He's my best fren 

Brendick: Tyler stop Josh is hyperventilating 

DunWithYou: NO IM NOT 

Stumped: Why am I outside

Stumped: Hey pete's here

Weekely: DO NOT GET IT THE CAR PATRICK.


	13. Spooked

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> short. Comments on this are great. I'm sorry that a sporadically update

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brendon changes from Brendick to Brendun because there are so many puns to make off his name

[11:25 PM]

Brendick: Why has no one been on this all day?

RestInPete: There's been a death in the family

Weekely: THATS NOT FUNNY IM GENIUNLY WORRIED THAT U KILLED PATRICK WITH YOUR INSANE DRIVING

Stumped: I'm okay just a little nauseous. I may have blacked out. 

Frankenfurter: Pete was driving? Please tell me someone took a video. 

DunWithYou: No sorry we were all fearing for our lives 

Frankenfurter: it's okay just remember next time 

RyRo: How do you delete a group chat someone else created?

RyRo: asking for a friend 

ProtectJosh2K16: you pray that this sin will be recognised and sent to hell where it belongs

Stumped: Josh get off of Tyler's account 

ProtectJosh2K16: damn

DunWithYou: how'd you know

Stumped: Tyler and I are innocence brethren. It's like a 5th sense. 

ProtectJosh2K16: oh shit you're alive Patrick?

Stumped: Tyler... We were having a moment..

Brendick: 5TH SENSE

Brendick: U MEAN 6TH????

Brendick: HAHAHAHHAHA

Weekely: well that was extremely obnoxious

Brendick: UNLESS PATRICK ONE OF YOUR OTHER SENSES DONT WORK. 

Brendick: LIKE YOUR SENSE OF FASHION

Stumped: wow

ProtectJosh2K16: or like Brendon's sense of humour. 

Weekely: tyLER 

Brendick: WOW 

DunWithYou: I LOVE

OTP: guys. Let me sleep. I haven't slept in two days. 

Brendick: no

[Brendick has changed the group name to Sleep Is For The Weak]

OTP: Also for a very tired situational insomniac who will murder you if you bother them again.

[Brendick has removed OTP from the chat]

Frankenfurter: Brendon

Brendick: what I was spooked

DunWithYou: would you say you were 

DunWithThem: Dun with him

ProtectJosh2K16: ooooooooooOooOOoo

[Brendick has changed their name to Brendun] 

Brendun: Yes


	14. JOSHLERSELFIE

[10:46 AM]

[RyRo had added OTP to the chat]

RyRo: GERARD YOU'RE IN CLASS WITH ME DID YOU SEE THAT

OTP: I was asleep

RyRo: WHY DID TYLER JUST RUN PAST THE WINDOW FASTER THAN I THINK IVE SEEN ANYONE MOVE

ProtectJosh2K16: ICE CREAM RUN

Brendun: Josh control your child boyfriend please 

DunWithYou: bbdnnrdjkssn

Brendun: excuse me

RyRo: JOSH JUST RAN PAST THE WINDOW WITH HIS PHONE IN HIS HAND

RyRo: WHY AREN'T YOU TWO IN TRACK JESUS CHRIST

ProtectJosh2K16: I don't work well on teams

DunWithYou: We could make a good team 

ProtectJosh2K16: I only work on one team*

RyRo: STOP IT GERARD JUST SCREAMED IN CLASS

RestInPete: I HEARD THAT FROM MY CLASS

Stumped: You're gonna cause a lockdown drill 

Iamhalsey: hey what'd I miss

RyRo: HALSEY NOW IS NOT THE TIME. JOSH AND TYLER ARE BEING LITERAL CHILDREN

Stumped: as opposed to figurative children?

RyRo: GERARD KEEPS SCREAMING IN CLASS

Stumped: I believe the correct term is screeching

RyRo: AMD APPARENTLY PATRICK IS BEING A SMARTASS

Iamhalsey: so are Josh and Tyler going to make it back before next period? I don't want to go to history alone please and thank you

[DunWithYou has sent an image to the chat.]  
(Image is a selfie of Josh and Tyler with an insane amount of ice cream. Josh looks like he's screaming at the camera and Tyler is 110% focused on the ice cream)

Brendun: you guys are dicks I want some

RyRo: I THINK GERARD IS HAVING A HEART ATTACK

OTP: JOSHLERSELFIE


	15. Stay in ur lane

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tyler changes from ProtectJosh2K16 to Hyler
> 
> Ryan changes from RyRo to RyanSauce

[12:28 PM] 

ProtectJosh2K16: Brendon just threatened to punch me in the face 

Frankenfurter: what why??

DunWithYou: yeah Brendon. Why. 

Brendun: he walked up to me and said "Hi-ler"

ProtectJosh2K16: it's pronounced and spelled

[ProtectJosh2K16 has changed their name to Hyler]

Brendun: do u see why I did what I did 

Hyler: listen you're the one who brought me into your friend group. You have to put up with the world play and puns. 

Hyler: personally I think I'm wonderful

RyRo: Pretty sure Josh thinks that too

DunWithYou: RYAN ROSS 

RyRo: WHAT IM NOT LYING

DunWithYou: I WILL TURN YOU INTO SAUCE. I WILL TURN YOU INTO SOUP. 

[RyRo has changed their name to RyanSauce]

RestInPete: you guys are always changing your names but they will never be as good as mine. 

Hyler: OH SO NO ONE YELLS AT RYAN

Brendun: I can't he has my dick

Brendun: I mean my heart

Brendun: I mean my friendship 

Weekely: And I'll have you by the throat if you don't watch yourself Brendon 

Stumped: OHHHHH

RestInPete: DRAMAAAAAA

Hyler: SUSPENSE

DunWithYou: ROMANCE

OTP: O2P

OTP: stands for OTP #2

OTP: It's clever. I'm clever. 

Hyler: what does that mean 

Frankenfurter: drama in the Ryden/Brallon family

Brendun: please don't call us a family incest is a sin

Frankenfurter: ARE YOU ADMITTING TO SOMETHING

Brendun: what

Brendun: look at the time

Brendun: time to

Brendun: stay in ur lane

Hyler: Hah actually..


	16. Puns or nuns

[4:12 PM]

Hyler: Why is everyone bullying me

Brendun: you have ridiculous amounts of puns. 

Hyler: YOUR NAME IS A PUN. PATRICK AND PETE AND FRANK AND JOSH AND RYAN AND DALLON ALL HAVE PUN NAMES TO. WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE TARGETED

Hyler: THE ONLY ONE WITHOUT A PUN NAME IS GERARD

OTP: no way

OTP: hey wait 

[OTP has changed their name to NoWay]

Brendun: God dammit

NoWay: OTP is NO TP now

Brendun: Tyler look what u did 

Hyler: THIS IS BULLYING.


	17. Dick pic

[2:54 AM]

[Brendun has sent an image to the chat]

RyanSauce: OH MY GOD BRENDON 

Weekely: BRENDON WE HAD A CONVERSATION ABOUT BOUNDRIES BEFORE. THIS IS CROSSING THEM. 

Frankenfurter: WHAT THE FUCK

NoWay: GET THAT OUT OF MY FACE BRENDON

Hyler: IT IS 3 IN THE MORNING WHY AM I BEING AFFRONTED BY A PENIS

DunWithYou: BRENDON I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU JUST SENT A DICK PIC TO THE CHAT. 

Iamhalsey: IM GOING TO SEND THSI TO  
YOUR MOM BRENDON

Brendun: ITS NOT MINE JESUS CHRIST

Brendun: I JUST NEEDED A RESPONSE TO MAKE THE KID THAT SENT IT TO ME STOP 

Hyler: SEND IT TO HIS MOM

Frankenfurter: I still did not need to see this

DunWithYou: my virgin eyes

RyanSauce: yeah. "Virgin"

DunWithYou: Stay out of my sex life Ryan

RyanSauce: You wear snapbacks and vans dude. 

DunWithYou: NOT ALL THE TIME

Hyler: at least he looks good in them

[Hyler sent an image to the chat]  
(It is a picture of a very young looking Ryan in a bright orange SnapBack that it too big for him.)

RyanSauce: WHERE DID YOU GET THIS

NoWay: IM SCREAMING OMG

Brendun: IM SCREENSHOTTING

RyanSauce: IM BLOCKING ALL OF YOU


	18. In the closet with Brendon

[7:32]

Brendun: iTs ScHoOl TiMe BiTcHeS

[Brendun sent an image to the chat]  
(It is a picture of Brendon in a scarf and tiara)

Brendun: This is my outfit 

Frankenfurter: I just woke up can you give me some time before you start acting like this.

Stumped: Brendon I feel like you're abusing the knowledge that you can send pictures to the chat. 

[Brendun sent an image to the chat]  
(Image of Brendon flipping the camera off, still in tiara and scarf)

 

[11:32 PM] 

RestInPete: Hey Dallon can I have the notes for math?

Weekely: yeah hang on I'm in the closet with Brendon

RestInPete: well, we all already knew that

Brendun: stfu Pete we're hiding from the teacher. If I get caught ditching one more time I'm gonna get suspended. 

Hyler: I dare you to blast music as loud as you can for ten seconds. 

DunWithYou: tYLER STOP ENCOURAGING BAD BEHAVIOUR 

Hyler: IM LIVING VICARIOUSLY THROUGH HIM

Brendun: DO IT FOR THE DARE

Weekely: BRENDON

Weekely: HE'S PLAYING BACKSTREET BOYS WTF ARE YOU DOING

Brendun: THERES FOOTSTEPS GET READY TO R U N

Weekely: I'm never ditching with you again. Or if I do I'm not letting you check the group chat.


	19. Do-No-Wrong-Tyler-Joseph

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Josh changes from DunWithYou to Jish
> 
> Tyler changes from Hyler to Do-No-Wrong-Tyler-Joseph

[3:16 PM]

Hyler: Jish I see you

Hyler: Josh. 

[DunWithYou has changed their name to Jish]

Jish: Where?

Hyler: behind you, why are you standing with a teacher?

Jish: call out to me, I threw a stapler into the wall earlier but if she see's do-no-wrong-Tyler-Joseph she'll let me go 

[Hyler has changed their name to Do-No-Wrong-Tyler-Joseph]

Do-No-Wrong-Tyler-Jospeh: copy

Brendun: ...

Brendun: is no one going to comment on what we just witnessed

Frankenfurter: I've taken Gerard's phone

Frankenfurter: I am running

Frankenfurter: I can't keep this up for much longer he's so fast

Frankenfurter: hgsha 

Brendun: u ok?

NoWay: OTP

Do-No-Wrong-Tyler-Joseph: WHAT

Stumped: Tyler. Brethren. Come here. 

Do-No-Wrong-Tyler-Joseph: where's that

RestInPete: back of the gym

Jish: Wow just like last time. Original. 

Stumped: Yeah it's real weird we're having another assembly even though we just had one 

Stumped: almost like it's an excuse to further the plot

Brendun: haha what


	20. Brendon is an honour roll student

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brendon changes from Brendun to honourBoyd 
> 
> I think I forgot to use RyanSauce in the last chapter I apologise

[Brendun has changed the group name to This Assembly Is Worse Than This Chat]

Brendun: I want to leave

Brendun: If I pretend to faint can I leave

Brendun: If I break my leg?

Brendun: If I break someone else's leg?

RyanSauce: shut up their calling honour roll kids up maybe Patrick will go up again this year.

RyanSauce: WAIT

Weekely: NO FUCKING WAY

Brendun: someone please tell me I'm hallucinating

NoWay: stand up honour boy, go get your handshake from the principal.

Jish: OH MY GOD

Jish: THE PRINCIPAL LOOKS SO HESITANT

Jish: THE PRESENTER KEEPS DOUBLE-CHECKING THE NAME

Jish: TYLER SHUT UP YOU CANT LAUGH RIGHT NOW PEOPLE WILL YELL AT US

RestInPete: HOW DID BRENDON BOYD URIE PULL OFF STRAIGHT A'S??????

[Brendun has changed their name to HonourBoyd]

HonourBoyd: I'd like to thank the academy and my many husbands. 

RestInPete: HOW DID YOU GET UP THERE AND PATRICK DIDN'T

Stumped: I got a B in Spanish 

HonourBoyd: hola bitches 

Weekely: WHAT

RyanSauce: IM GOING TO BLOCK YOU


	21. JoNOman

[1:15]

[HonourBoyd has added JoFRO to the chat]

[JoFRO has changed their name to JoNO]

[JoNO has left the chat]

HonourBoyd: wow

Frankenfurter: did he just diss this whole chat and then leave without saying anything

RyanSauce: the real question is how come he gets to leave and we all have to stay

NoWay: yeah #equalrightsfight

HonourBoyd: guys I'm not making him mad that's terrifying. 

RestInPete: do you people ever shut the fuck up

HonourBoyd: Not as far as I'm aware 

Jish: so everyone is aware that it's too early and yet everyone is replying?

[HonourBoyd has changed the group name to masochists assemble]

RyRo: IM REPORTING

Do-No-Wrong-Tyler-Joseph: BLOCKED

HonourBoyd: Tyler you say you do no wrong but I have screenshots that say otherwise HEYO

Jish: WHAT

[Do-No-Wrong-Tyler-Joseph has removed HonourBoyd from the chat]


	22. Do-No-Right-Tyler-Joseph

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler changes from Do-No-Wrong-Tyler-Joseph to Do-No-Right-Tyler Joseph

[1:25 AM]

[RyanSauce has added HonourBoyd to the chat]

HonourBoyd: HOW DARE YOU REMOVE ME FROM MY OWN CHAT 

Do-No-Wrong-Tyler-Joseph: IT WAS AN ACCIDENT

HonourBoyd: REALLY WHAT A COINCIDENCE SAYING IT WAS RIGHT AFTER I SAID I COULD REVEAL YOUR SINNNNN

Jish: SPILL

Do-No-Wrong-Tyler-Joseph: I FEEL BETRAYED 

HonourBoyd: DIVINE PUNISHMENT 

[HonourBoyd has sent a 4 images to the chat]  
(The first two are screenshots of a private chat Brendon had with a very drunk Tyler who states some of the sexual things he has done, the other two are pictures of Tyler in freshman year of high school with a sports bra on)

Do-No-Wrong-Tyler-Joseph: gtg drink bleach

[Do-No-Wrong-Tyler-Joseph has left the chat]

Jish: OH MY GOD

RyanSauce: SINSINSIN

[Weekely has added Do-No-Wrong-Tyler-Joseph to the chat]

Weekely: TYLER

HonourBoyd: WHERES THE "INNOCENT BEAN SPEECH" NOW JOSH

Jish: i mean hey if he's into it I'm into it

HonourBoyd: WHAT

RyanSauce: KINKY

[Do-No-Wrong-Tyler-Joseph has changed their name to Do-No-Right-Tyler-Joseph]

HonourBoyd: WHAT

NoWay: WHAT DID WE JUST WITNESS


	23. FRICK YOU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Josh changes from Jish to JISH_INTENSIFIED

[3:29 PM]

HonourBoyd: WHICH ONE OF YOU FUCKERS DID IT

RyanSauce: what's "it"?

Weekely: who's "it"?

RestInPete: You'll have to be more specific 

HonourBoyd: WHO PUT THE EGGS IN MY GYM LOCKER

Frankenfurter: You use your gym locker

NoWay: Why?

HonourBoyd: WHO DID IT

Stumped: I don't know quite egging out

HonourBoyd: SHUT UP

RestInPete: calm down how do you know it was one of us

HonourBoyd: YOU GUYS ARE THE ONLY ONE'S WHO'D DO IT. 

NoWay: well it wasn't me 

HonourBoyd: I DONT CARE WHO DIDN'T DO IT I WANNA KNOW YOU DID DO IT

NoWay: wow rude

Stumped: careful Gerard we all have to walk on egg shells around him today

HonourBoyd: ONE MORE PUN PATRICK

HonourBoyd: ONE MORE. AND YOU'LL NEVER SEE YOUR HATS AGAIN

RyanSauce: #HatThreat

Do-No-Right-Tyler-Joseph: sounds like you're in a bit of a predicament Brendon

Weekely: oh no

HonourBoyd: TYLER

Do-No-Right-Tyler-Joseph: Are you feeling a little stressed. A little tense?

Do-No-Right-Tyler-Joseph: almost shell-shocked?

Stumped: IT WASN'T ME THIS TIME

HonourBoyd: I SWEAR TO GOD TYLER

RyanSauce: Tyler start running he knows where you live

Do-No-Right-Tyler-Joseph: I'm not at my house I'm at Josh's 

Weekely: Brendon think this through you'd have to go through Josh 

HonourBoyd: FUCK

HonourBoyd: THAT'S NOT FAIR JOSH IS RIPPED FROM DRUMMING

Frankenfurter: he'd rip you in half

[Jish has changed their name to JISH_INTESIFIED]

JISH_INTENSIFIED: Don't frick with me

RestInPete: JOSH YOU CAN'T JUST SAY FRICK IN REPLACE OF FUCK

JISH_INTENSIFIED: FRICK YOU

HonourBoyd: YOUVE STARTED A WAR TYLER JOSEPH

RyanSauce: technically I think you started it Brendon with the whole "I'm going to send your kinks to the chat"

HonourBoyd: FRICK YOU


	24. Heyo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tyler goes from Do-No-Right-Tyler-Joseph to TylerBell
> 
> Not gonna lie the only reason for the change is because I was tired of typing out Do-No-Right-Tyler-Joseph

[1:55 PM]

HonourBoyd: heyo fuckweasels meet me in the music room

Weekely: fuckweasels...

RyanSauce: I haven't mentioned it up to this point but you need to stop saying heyo Brendon you sound like a creepy uncle. 

HonourBoyd: heyno 

HonourBoyd: w

HonourBoyd: you're an all star 

RyanSauce: If you continue I will murder you I promise

NoWay: Why in the music room

HonourBoyd: got an idea

Frankenfurter: can we have more details?

HonourBoyd: when u get here

Do-No-Right-Tyler-Joseph: can't. Josh and I are at Taco Bell. 

RestInPete: ?????

Do-No-Right-Tyler-Joseph: what?

RestInPete: It's the middle of 3rd period?? At school? Like rn. Like we are actively in class why are you at Taco Bell

[Do-No-Right-Tyler-Joseph has changed their name to TylerBell]

TylerBell: let me live man I'm young

Stumped: can I come?

TylerBell: yeah come on man

RestInPete: PATRICK SIT DOWN

HonourBoyd: If you guys could stop being children for .3 seconds, what time are you getting back

TylerBell: Excuse u don't talk to me like that just because you don't understand the legend that is Taco Bell. 

JishINTENSIFIED: heyo

HonourBoyd: I SWEAR TO GOD

HonourBoyd: AND I GET CALLED THE IMMATURE ONE

RyanSauce: technically you created this, so you're the cause 

HonourBoyd: take your technicality and shove it up your ass Ryan Ross

RyanSauce: kinky

Weekely: CONSIDER YOURSELF REPORTED


	25. No egg throwing involved.

[4:55 PM]

Frankenfurter: alright Brendon all of us are here except you what are you planning 

RestInPete: I swear if you're trying to bring us all in on Tyler and your little prank war I will shoot you

HonourBoyd: no Tyler and I resolved that issue

TylerBell: yes. That's what we did. In a civilised fashion. Absolutely no egg throwing involved. 

NoWay: Real convincing

TylerBell: good. It's 100% the truth

HonourBoyd: I'm almost there

IamHalsey: why wasn't I invited to the band room meeting

JishuaINTENSIFIED: YOU WERE YOU'RE JUST NEVER CHECKING THIS

IamHalsey: KEEP ME UPDATED PLEASE

IamHalsey: SOMEONE

Stumped: I elect Pete

TylerBell: I second that

Stumped: thanks Tyler 

NoWay: I third that 

JishINTENSIFIED: I fourth that

Weekely: this isn't how this works. 

RestInPete: I'll do it

Stumped: What a hero

RestInPete: Brendon just came in with a tiara on

Frankenfurter: I THOUGHT HE WAS KIDDING ABOUT THAT


	26. Petedate

[5:06 PM]

RestInPete: coming in with your daily Pete update here in the band room. 

IamHalsey: I'm so excited 

Stumped: #Petedate

RestInPete: Brendon has announced he has a grand scheme 

RestInPete: he's walking to a mysteriously covered object

RestInPete: He got distracted; he's tying his shoelaces please hold

RestInPete: oh no

IamHalsey: DONT LEAVE ME HANGING WHATS HAPPENING

RestInPete: Sorry I shocked into silence 

RestInPete: Brendon has uncovered a board that has rules written on it

RestInPete: He wants us to start a club with him

IamHalsey: CAN I JOIN

RestInPete: I'll ask

RestInPete: he said and I quote "no girls allowed I'm too gay"


	27. Proud father

RyanSauce: I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU ALL JOINED BRENDON'S FAKE CLUB

JishINTENSIFIED: WE WERE FORCED. 

HonourBoyd: ITS NOT FAKE WE ARE TAKING IT TO THE PRINCIPAL TODAY AFTER CLASS

Frankenfurter: IT DOESN'T EVEN HAVE A PURPOSE YOU JUST WANT AN EXCUSE TO HAVE POWER OVER AN EMPTY CLASSROOM 

HonourBoyd: HE DOESN'T NEED TO KNOW THAT

RyanSauce: WHAT ARE YOU EVEN PLANNING TO TELL HIM

HonourBoyd: we're a music club

HonourBoyd: which isn't a lie. I mean we all are musically inclined. I've seen everyone sing or play an instrument besides Tyler

JishINTENSIFIED: Tyler does everything

HonourBoyd: what do you mean

TylerBell: I sing but also I write songs and I play piano, bass, ukelele, keytar, tambourine, Sinth, kind of drums, kind of trumpet, and most importantly didgeridoo

RyanSauce: Shit Tyler is the entire club 

HonourBoyd: and with good, perfect attendance, teacher's pets like Tyler and Patrick he has to say yes 

Stumped: I'm not a teachers pet 

Weekely: Patrick yesterday you recited half the periodic table on conmand

Stumped: I just have an extensive memory okay

TylerBell: I have no excuse. If you're in good with the teachers you get away with more stuff 

HonourBoyd: I'm going to screenshot this and show all of your teachers 

TylerBell: then your club will never live 

HonourBoyd: sneaky 

JishINTENSIFIED: I'm a proud father

TylerBell: faTHER

TylerBell: dADDY

JishINTENSIFIED: ;)

RyanSauce: I CANNOT BELIEVE

NoWay: I live through this OTP 

Frankenfurter: I'm not even surprised anymore


	28. Best behaviour

[4:44 PM]

HonourBoyd: Tyler get your ass down here 

TylerBell: excuse u?

HonourBoyd: I'm on my best behaviour here with Dallon and Ryan and we need someone actually good here

Weekely: "best behaviour"

RyanSauce: not only did you scream fuck when you stubbed your toe coming into the office, you also told him he "was getting old" because of his grey hair. 

TylerBell: oh god you really do need help

HonourBoyd: bring Patrick too

TylerBell: what was that?

HonourBoyd: please

TylerBell: hmm

HonourBoyd: I'll buy you a taco

TylerBell: C'MON PATRICK YOU AND ME ARE GONNA GO SAVE THE TRIPLETS

Stumped: Okay!!

RestInPete: PATRICK

RestInPete: PATRICK SIT DOWN

RestInPete: TYLER HE JUST RAN INTO THE HALL FIND HIM BEFORE A TEACHER DOES 

TylerBell: Copy


	29. Here to save ur butts

[4:53 PM]

TylerBell: PATRICK AND I ARE ON OUR WAY TO SAVE UR BUTTS

Stumped: We're saving the triplets

RyanSauce: oh god please do not call is triplets that toon my mind to very dark places 

Frankenfurter: WHAT

HonourBoyd: thank you Tyler and Patrick

Frankenfurter: NO. WHAT. 

JishINTENSIFIED: Tyler can I come?

HonourBoyd: hang on he's talking to he principal

HonourBoyd: holy shit this is incredible 

HonourBoyd: what the fuck dos that word mean. 

HonourBoyd: WAIT WHAT DID THAT WORD MEAN NOW PATRICK IS TALKING TOO

Weekely: they are having a discussion your child ears don't understand 

HonourBoyd: who knew Tyler could speak so much

HonourBoyd: THEY GOT US UP AND RUNNING YES

TylerBell: YOU'RE WELCOME

Stumped: It wasn't that hard

HonourBoyd: that's what she said

Frankenfurter: ew go back to 2012

JishINTENSIFIED: Tyler

TylerBell: yeah?

JishINTENSIFIED: what that mouth do

NoWay: HNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGG

TylerBell: talk shit


	30. OfficiallyTM

[5:22 PM]

HonourBoyd: WHAT UP BITCHES

RestInPete: unfortunately not my grades

HonourBoyd: IM IN THE OFFICIAL CLUB ROOM AS THE OFFICIAL CAPTAIN

TylerBell: great I'm officiallyTM getting Josh to beat you up if you don't give me money for that taco you promised. 

HonourBoyd: will 4 dollars cover it

TylerBell: yeah

HonourBoyd: good that's all I have

TylerBell: omw 

Stumped: is anyone going to the football game tonight? 

JishINTENSIFIED: I have to my brother is playing

TylerBell: aw I'll go with you I can meet your family

JishINTENSIFIED: yeah they can meet the reason I've been making drum recordings for a song about Taco Bell 

TylerBell: I'm introducing myself as your best friend 

JishINTENSIFIED: thats what u are I hope you would 

Frankenfurter: I THINK YOUVE KILLED GERARD

HonourBoyd: I'm officiallyTM going to throw up


	31. HonourBad

[5:22 AM]

[HonourBoyd has sent an image to the chat]  
(It's a picture of the club room, now decorated)

HonourBoyd: Look what I did

RyanSauce: WHY ARE YOU THERE SO EARLY SCHOOL DOESNT START TILL ALMOST 8

HonourBoyd: I just slept here

RyanSauce: You slept in the club room

HonourBoyd: yes

RyanSauce: did you tell your mom?

HonourBoyd: I forgot until she called me at 2 screaming 

HonourBoyd: she over reacted 

RyanSauce: if my child went missing, especially with your track record, I'd freak out too

HonourBoyd: I've done nothing wrong my whole life

RyanSauce: what about when we were in middle school and you threw the teachers coffee machine out of the window

HonourBoyd: it was an accident 

Weekely: what about when you hid doll heads in the principals office in freshman year?

HonourBoyd: that was a harmless joke

Weekely: he almost had a heart attack

HonourBoyd: that's his fault for overreacting 

Stumped: what about when you filled my hat with mud?

HonourBoyd: you needed to stop wearing that hat I did you a favour

RestInPete: what about threatening to cut my hair all the time?

HonourBoyd: Again, a favour

RestInPete: WOW

Frankenfurter: you pantsed both Gerard and I the middle of gym

HonourBoyd: it was funny. Did it for the jokes

JishINTENSIFIED: when I first met you, I bumped in to you and you screamed "SUCK MY DICK SPACE BOY" at the top of your lungs

HonourBoyd: and it was the birth of a beautiful friendship 

TylerBell: I mean, I haven't even known you that long and you've already thrown eggs at me, and sent pictures of me in middle school to people. 

HonourBoyd: that's also the foundation of a good friendship. 

Weekely: what about that one time you handed Halsey ten dollars and told her to go buy a better attitude 

IamHalsey: shit why am I friends with you?

HonourBoyd: shut the fuck up you all love me


	32. Tragic threesome

[2:26 PM]

Weekely: hey does anyone know where Pete is

RyanSauce: why

Weekely: he's not in class and I don't want to be in here by myself

Stumped: he Wentz to the store

HonourBoyd: that physically hurt my soul

JishINTENSIFIED: Patrick no

TylerBell: Ahahahahhaaha yes I love you Patrick 

Stumped: Patrick yes. I love you too Tyler

JishINTENSIFIED: I feel betrayed 

RestInPete: I think I can't be your friend anymore

HonourBoyd: you were never just his friend anyways

RestInPete: STAY OUT OF MY LIFE BRENDON WORK ON YOUR TRAGIC THREESOME

Frankenfurter: I don't think the words tragic and threesome go together well

RyanSauce: WOW RUDE 

Weekely: IM REPORTING

JishINTENSIFIED: the bet part of this by far is the fact that he didn't even say he was talking about you two

TylerBell: ooooooooohhhhHhhhhhHhHhHH

HonourBoyd: no comment

TylerBell: OOOOOOOhooooohHHhhhhHHH

TylerBell: DRAMAAAAAAA

JishINTENSIFIED: Tyler calm down

TylerBell: ROMANCEeeeeeeEEE

JishINTENSIFIED: TYLER GET BACK IN HERE THE TEACHER IS GOING TO HAVE A HEART ATTACK

TylerBell: IM GOING TO FIND BRENDON AND JOIN THE THREESOME

TylerBell: A QUADRUPLESOME

Frankenfurter: Nah man that's just an orgy

JishINTENSIFIED: EXCUSE ME DONT MAKE ME COME AFTER YOU TYLER

HonourBoyd: He's welcome ( ͡ʘ╭͜ʖ╮͡ʘ)

JishINTENSIFIED: NO HE'S NOT 

Weekely: I agree ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉)

RyanSauce: STOP THAT

TylerBell: JOSH IS CHASING ME

TylerBell: WHY IS HE SO FAST

RyanSauce: I TOLD YOU YOU TWO SHOULD BE IN TRACK

TylerBell: THIS IS NOT THE TIME FOR A LECTURE ON TRACK RYAN


	33. Theoretically

[4:14 PM]

NoWay: I'm on the second floor

Frankenfurter: okay?

NoWay: how far do u think it is to the ground?

HonourBoyd: far enough

Stumped: don't jump

NoWay: let's say if I theoretically put a trampoline down there

Frankenfurter: theoretically

NoWay: yea

NoWay: u think I would break anything?

JishINTENSIFIED: like anything on your body

TylerBell: or in it

NoWay: yea

RestInPete: You might rip through the trampoline 

NoWay: wow rude 

RestInPete: no I meant like the sudden impact 

NoWay: no no I get it Pete. I see how it is

Frankenfurter: wait Gerard why are you on the second floor

NoWay: cause it's empty

Stumped: why are you even thinking about what would happen if there was a trampoline 

NoWay: theoretically 

Frankenfurter: HOW DID YOU GET A TRAMPOLINE ON CAMPUS

NoWay: theoretically if I were to bring the parts in a box and come in through the back gate and build it near the building no one uses

HonourBoyd: Hahahaha come in through the back gate

Frankenfurter: GERARD

NoWay: THEORETICALLY 

Frankenfurter: GERARD

NoWay: so I wouldn't break any bones correct?

HonourBoyd: DO A FLIP

Frankenfurter: BRENDON

TylerBell: WAIT I WANNA RECORD IT WAIT IM COMING TO YOU

JishINTENSIFIED: TYLER DO NOT MAKE ME CHASE YOU AGAIN IM

TylerBell: THEN RUN WITH ME

JishINTENSIFIED: YOURE TOO FAST

TylerBell: GRAB MY HAND 

NoWay: alright I'll wait for the OTP

Frankenfurter: geRARD I SWEAR TO GOD

TylerBell: AH I SEE YOU 

NoWay: YOU READY?

TylerBell: YEAH GO HEAD

Frankenfurter: IF HE BREAKS ANYTHING IM KICKING EVERYONES ASSES

HonourBoyd: I have no part in this

Frankenfurter: YOU WERE ENCOURAGING HIM

TylerBell: THAT WAS SICK

JishINTENSIFIED: SO SICK

NoWay: GOOD NEWS NOTHING BROKE

TylerBell: BAD NEWS I THINK I SEE FRANK

TylerBell: LETS GO JISH

NoWay: I CAN DIE HAPPY THEY RAN AWAY HOLDING HANDS

Frankenfurter: GERARD

NoWay: OH GOD


	34. Broomstick

[7:32 PM]

HonourBoyd: guys I'm grounded

Stumped: Why??

RyanRauce: that's the funniest thing I've heard in my life

JishINTENSIFIED: how. One time you jumped out of your moms car and you didn't get in trouble

Weekely: once you jumped off your roof and landed on your dad and you still got off

HonourBoyd: she found out I failed a history test

[HonourBoyd has changed their name to HonourBad]

RyanSauce: Brendon Urie. The holy grail of the "I don't give a fuck" attitude, got grounded

HonourBad: yeah

HonourBad: you guys want to come to a party on Thursday

Weekely: I don't think you understand the concept of being grounded 

HonourBad: my parents are going out of town tomorrow and won't be back till Monday

HonourBad: that's why I still have my phone 

TylerBell: so you're grounded, and yet you have your phone and having a party on a school night 

HonourBad: listen Tyler we can't all be good little Christian ChildrenTM okay

TylerBell: excuse me I smoked a whole weed and my left arm fell off

Stumped: yeah I was there I can vouch for him 

HonourBad: so then let's have a drinking contest? At my party?

JishINTENSIFIED: NO

TylerBell: you're on paint brush

RyanSauce: PAINTBRUSH

RyanSauce: TYLER IM SUDDENDLY IN LOVE WITH YOU

TylerBell: good that makes it easier to join the threesome

JishINTENSIFIED: GIVE IT A REST

[HonourBad has changed their name to Paintbrush]


	35. I never back down from a challenge

[5:44 PM]

Paintbrush: PARTYS TOMORROW TYLER WERE STILL ON RIGHT

NoWay: WHY CAN'T YOU USE APOSTROPHES 

Paintbrush: STFU GERALD

TylerBell: YEAH WE'RE STILL ON

NoWay: GERALD

JishINTENSIFIED: Brendon if Tyler is drinking when I show up I will break every bone in your broomstick body

NoWay: awww

Paintbrush: NOW THINGS ARE GETTING HEATED AND PERSONAL

Frankenfurter: cmon Josh is so sweet he wouldn't hurt a fly

Weekely: You haven't seen him play dodgeball 

Frankenfurter: yes I have??? He always is shielding Tyler

NoWay: AWWWWW

Weekely: no i mean you haven't seen him play when Brendon's on the other team

Paintbrush: *war flashbacks*

Weekely: his throw is what killed the dinosaurs 

Weekely: it's like a meteor shower

JishINTENSIFIED: Leave me alone I drum

TylerBell: it's pretty sick

NoWay: AM I GONNA HAVE TO CHANGE MY NAME BACK TO OTP

TylerBell: well that depends on if anyone decides to tell me WHAT IT MEANS


	36. Bean Bretheren

[9:42 PM]

Paintbrush: Pete

Paintbrush: Patrick 

Paintbrush: where are you

RestInPete: we aren't coming 

Paintbrush: WHAT

RestInPete: LAST TIME WE CAME TO ONE OF YOUR PARTIES PATRICK GOT LEFT OUTSIDE 

Stumped: and it's a school night soooo

Stumped: gotta keep up that honour roll cred

Paintbrush: CMON IM MISSING A PIECE OF MY HEART WOTHOUT YOU HERE

RestInPete: you don't need it 

Paintbrush: I miss your musk

RestInPete: now we're definitely not coming

Paintbrush: please

RestInPete: no

Paintbrush: please x1000

RestInPete: no x1000

TylerBell: Patrick come

Stumped: okay anything for my bean brethren 

Stumped: Pete let's go

RestInPete: okay

Paintbrush: WOW


	37. Panic! at the Paintbrush

[10:33 PM]

JishINTENSIFIED: Why are all of you sitting in front of the door to the kitchen?

JishINTENSIFIED: like calm down come sit on the couch

JishINTENSIFIED: hey where's Tyler

JishINTENSIFIED: and Brendon

RyanSauce: oh no 

JishINTENSIFIED: YOU ASSES GET OUT OF THE WAY

RyanSauce: BRACE FOR IMPACT 

JishINTENSIFIED: WHY ARE YOU ALL DOING THIS 

Weekely: he's paying us

JishINTENSIFIED: is it enough to cover hospital bills?

RyanSauce: no

JishINTENSIFIED: then I suggest you move

Paintbrush: NO GUYSSS HOLD OUTTI ALMOS GOT EM

TylerBell: NO YA'DINT

Frankenfurter: hospital gowns aren't my thing I'm moving

RestInPete: I agree

NoWay: I'll always cheer on the OTP

Stumped: I'm too soft to hold Josh back anyways 

Weekely: y'know I think imma go

RyanSauce: yeah I'm with you guys

Paintbrush: NO. YOU ASSHOLES

Paintbrush: JOSH STAY AWAY FROM ME I SWEAR HE'S NOT EVEN DRUNK WHEN YOU COME IN HERE YOU'LL SEE HE'S FINE I SWEAR

TylerBell: Brendon now u lookk like a panicked paintbrush

TylerBell: Panic! at the Paintbrush

Paintbrush: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN SHUT UP YOU'RE FINE

Paintbrush: JOSH NO STAY THERE I CAN SEE YOU IN THE DOORWAY

RyanSauce: why don't u just talk to him?

Paintbrush: HED HEAR THE FEAR IN MY VOICE


	38. Petedate #2

[12:47 AM]

Stumped: Anyone know where Pete Wentz?

Paintbrush: NOT THIS AGAIN MY BRAIN IS STILL RECOVERING I CANT HANDLE THIS

IamHalsey: recovering from what?

RestInPete: HALSEY BOY I SURE DO HAVE AN UPDATE FOR YOU

IamHalsey: the anticipation is killing me

RestInPete: SINCE WE LAST SPOKE BRENDON HAS GOTTEN AN OFFICICAL CLUB (thanks to Tyler and Patrick) DECORATED THE CLUB ROOM. TYLER AND JOSH HAVE BEEN ACTING EVEM MORE GAY THAN BEFORE, BRENDON ADMITTED TO HAVING A THREESOME WITH RYAN AND DALLON, GOT GROUNDED AND IGNORED THAT FACT. WE ARE AT A PARTY IF HIS AMD HE GOT TYLER SO DRUNK THAT JOSH GOT SCARY AND SLAPPED HIM SO HARD HE ACTUALLY PASSED OUT. HE HASN'T BEEN THE SAME SINCE

IamHalsey: this is what I thrive on

IamHalsey: wow a threesome. Go big or go home I guess

RyanSauce: HE NEVER SAID THAT

Paintbrush: ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉)


	39. Boat shoes

[2:12 AM]

NoWay: has anyone seen my shoe?

TylerBell: YA'DINT NEED EM GEE

TylerBell: LET THEM GO

RestInPete: pretty sure Tyler threw them in the pool an hour ago

NoWay: TYLER WHY

TylerBell: THEYA RE BOAT SHOES

TylerBell: THEY NEED TO BE WITH THE WATER GERARD

NoWay: WHERE IS JOSH WHY ISN'T HE CONTROLLING THE CHILD

Weekely: WHEN THEY'RE BOTH DRUNK THEY ARE LIKE THE ULTIMATE TEAM

RyanSauce: YOU GOT JOSH TO DRINK 

Weekely: he couldn't resist body shots off Tyler sorry not sorry

NoWay: WHAT

Frankenfurter: GERARD IS COUGHING SO HARD HES GONNA THROW UP

NoWay: DO U HAVE PHOTOGRAPHIC EVIDENCe

Weekely: Yea

NoWay: all is forgiven. Tyler don't worry about the shoes. You're right I don't need them

NoWay: I can die happily 

RyanSauce: Dallon I'd keep  
That picture to yourself or whenever Josh sobers up you're gonna be like Brendon

Paintbrush: LEAVE ME ALONE IM FINE

RyanSauce: YOUVE FALLEN DOWN THE STAIRS FOUR TIMES

Paintbrush: ITS CAUSE IM DRUNK THATS ALL

RyanSauce: right


	40. Sin pile

[4:56 AM]

Paintbrush: Guys what do you call a roster with no spine?

RyanSauce: what

Paintbrush: no. It was a question. I want to know. 

Weekely: dead probably 

Paintbrush: wow there was no need

RestInPete: Brendon Gerard's on the roof again

Paintbrush: that's fine tbh I don't know where anyone is

RestInPete: we're all laying outside

Paintbrush: YOU GUYS KEEP DOING THAT WITHOUT ME

TylerBell: Thays cause we're afraid your  
Broom hair is gonna impale us

Paintbrush: MY HAIR IS FINE

Paintbrush: you all are literally stacked up. Like a giant man pile. Sausage fest

Weekely: don't call it that 

Paintbrush: I'm into it

Stumped: oh god now you can't come I'm  
On top of I feel anything poking me I'm suing 

Frankenfurter: consider yourself lucky I'm at the bottom. None of you are light

RestInPete: speaking of which, one of you have been laying on my arm this whole time and I can't feel it. 

Weekely: sorry I'll move

RyanSauce: DALLON IF YOU DONT GET YOUR KNEE AWAY FROM MY CROTCH IM CUTTING YOUR LEG OFF

JishINTENSIFIED: Gerard come down and join us in the sin pile

[Paintbrush has changed the group name to "Sin Pile"]

Frankenfurter: NO GERARD DONT JUMP COME DOWN LIKE A NORMAL PERSON


	41. Matching icons for you and bae

[3:46 PM]

Frankenfurter: why did I just wake up with a massive headache and all of you dipshits laying on me

Frankenfurter: my back is probably broken

RyanSauce: I've been up for a while but none of us can move until Brendon and Patrick move 

Weekely: this was a bad idea on everyone's part. Though I could make it so much worse 

JishINTENSIFIED: how could you make this worse

NoWay: do it I dare u

[Weekely has sent an image to the chat]  
(Image is a very drunk Josh doing what's probably his fifth tequila shot off of Tyler's stomach)

RyanSauce: WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT IM RIGHT NEXT TO HIM 

NoWay: NEW WALLPAPER

TylerBell: same

NoWay: WHAT

RestInPete: if u don't stop hyperventilating in my face Gerard I'm going to punch you

[Weekely has sent an image to the chat]  
(Image of Josh carrying Tyler bridal style while Tyler is taking a shot)

Weekely: matching icons for u and bae

RyanSauce: DONT MAKE IT WORSE YOURE ADDING FUEL TO THE FIRE 

JoshINTENSIFIED: once I get out of this sin pile I'm snapping your phone in half

TylerBell: I kind of like them

JoshINTENSIFIED: yeah but I need some sort of revenge. We can still keep them 

TylerBell: aight

NoWay: OW PETE WHAT WAS THAT FOR

RestInPete: I FUCKING WARNED YOU ABOUT THE HYPERVENTILATING 

RestInPete: I JUST WANT OUT OF THIS. DALLON YOU'RE CLOSET WAKE UP BRENDON

Paintbrush: oh I've been awake the whole time


	42. Festive spirit

[6:45 PM]

Weekely: JOSH I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT YOU ACTUALLY SNAPPED MY PHONE IN HALF

Stumped: Dallon you literally have like three more 

Weekely: SO?

JishINTENSIFIED: it was in the festive spirit. Just git too excited that's all sorry bud

RestInPete: Dallon why do you have so many phones?

Weekely: keepin track of my hoes man

RyanSauce: what does Josh mean by "Festive spirit"?

Paintbrush: ITS AMERICA DAY MOTHER FUCKERS GET UR FIREWORKS COME ON WE CAN SHOOT AMERICA GUNS AND EAT AMERICA FOOD 

TylerBell: Only if we can take an America selfie so I can prove to my mom I'm not in a cult

Paintbrush: DEAL

JishINTENSIFIED: NO TYLER WE JUST LEFT HIS HOUSE WE ARE NOT GOIMG BACK

Frankenfurter: Tyler why does your mom think you're in a cult

TylerBell: she overheard a phone conversation I had about drinking and now my poor good Christian mother is thinking I'm in some satanist rebellion group

NoWay: tbh she's not far off


	43. BreadBag

[8:33 PM]

NoWay: ALRIGHT WHO SHOT A FIRECRACKER AT ME FROM THE BUSHES I WILL FIGHT

Stumped: sorry Gee I mis-aimed

NoWay: Patrick is literally the only one I can't fight god dammit

Frankenfurter: why can't you fight him?

RestInPete: I'd kill him

NoWay: no because he's too soft I'd feel bad

Stumped: smol and soft

Paintbrush: that's what she said

Frankenfurter: I SWEAR

[Frankenfurter has removed Paintbrush from the chat]

Stumped: no it's okay he can come back

[Stumped has added Paintbrush to the chat]

Paintbrush: I FEEL SO DISRESPECTED THIS IS THE SECOND TIME IVE BEEN REMOVED FROM MY OWN CHAT

Paintbrush: I AM THE GOD OF THIS PLACE

Paintbrush: THANK YOU PATRICK IM SORRY I MADE A YOUR MOM JOKE @YOU

Stumped: Thays okay breadbag

RyanSauce: HAHAHAHAHA

Paintbrush: I feel so abused 

Paintbrush: but

[Paintbrush has changed their name to BreadBag]


	44. Unwarranted revenge

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The comments on this are v great I'm glad everyone has the same strange sense of humour   
> Also I forgot to mention the obvious in the last chapter Brendon changes to BreadBag

[10:15 PM]

Weekely: JOSH PLEASE CONTROL TYLER HE ONLY HAS THOSE PAPER POPPER THINGS AND HE'S STILL HURTING ME

JishINTENSIFIED: who's the one who gave him Redbull? Not me

JishINTENSIFIED: I'm enjoying myself watching this leave me alone

Weekely: WHY ARE YOU WATCHING ME GET HURT

JishINTENSOFIED: payback 

Weekely: UNWARRANTED PAYBACK. YOU ALREADY SNAPPED MY PHONE IM HALF 

JishINTENSIFIED: yeah but I'm sure you're up to something else

Weekely: YOURE JUST ASSUMING 

Weekely: TYLER THERE IS ONLY 10 MINUTES TILL FOREWORKS STOP CHASING ME YOU ARE SO FAST

RyanSauce: I'm telling you, track boy at its finest 

Weekely: NOT THE TIME RYAN


	45. Petedate #3

[11:49 PM]

Frankenfurter: GERARD IN WHAT WAY DID YOU THINK TAPING A MORTER TO YOUR LEG WAS A GOOD IDEA

Frankenfurter: NOW YOU HAVE A GIANT BURN ON YOUR LEG

NoWay: Ryan did it too and he's fine 

Frankenfurter: if Ryan jumped off a bridge would you do it too

NoWay: definitely

NoWay: I'd be the one instigating the jump

NoWay: I'm a leader not a follower

RestInPete: you're a boy with hair long enough to braid and sharpie tattoos 

TylerBell: then again you did build a trampoline and jump out of a second story window onto it so

TylerBell: which was sick

JishINTENSIFIED: So sick

IamHalsey: I need a petedate 

RestInPete: WOW HALSEY KEEP UP

RestInPete: alright since we last updated you, Josh has broken Dallons phone for taking pictures of him and Tyler doing things that I will not mention in fear of my phone also dying. 

JishINTENSIFIED: smart kid

RestInPete: we are back at Brendon's house God knows why

Stumped: it's for America day. We all know why

RestInPete: nobody's had any alcohol luckily but Tyler had about 4 redbulls and we stopped counting how many Brendon had

IamHalsey: is Tyler okay?

TylerBell: in freaking zazzed 

JishINTENSIFIED: frEAKING ZAZZED 

RestInPete: now Dallon ran away to hide from Tyler and suspiciously close behind him were Brendon and Ryan. Probably up to their threesome shit

IamHalsey: this is a no-kink-shaming-zone okay guys leave them alone

RyanSauce: WE. ARE. GETTING. FOOD. 

JishINTENSIFIED: getting something

BreadBag: ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉)

RyanSauce: BRENDON

RestInPete: Gerard taped a mortar cannon to leg and now he has a giant burn up his calf

NoWay: battle scar

RestInPete: Last time I saw frank was about two minutes against he was going to look for bandages

IamHalsey: aw

RestInPete: I'm not entirely sure what Patrick is doing I think he's gluing two fireworks together. As long as it doesn't come near me I'm fine

Stumped: don't worry about it 

RestInPete: and now it looks like Tyler finally crashed from all the RedBull and is sleeping on Josh's shoulder which is very gay

JishINTENSIFIED: you are literally gay Pete 

RestInPete: yeah that's why I can spot when you two are being gay 

RestInPete: which is always 

JishINTENSIFIED: leave me alone he's my best friend 

NoWay: I CANT EVEN FEEL THE BURN ON MY LEG ANYMORE OTPOTPOTPOTP

JishINTENSIFIED: are you ever going to tell Tyler what that means

NoWay: It's better like this


	46. Bros

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tyler goes from "TylerBell" to  
> TYLERBROSEPH
> 
> Josh goes from "JishINTENSIFIED" to HOMIEDUN

[12:23 PM]

RestInPete: I need everyone to my house asap

Stumped: I'm here

RestInPete: Patrick I know I obviously wasn't addressing you

Stumped: oh

RyanSauce: why?

JishINTENSIFIED: Pete Wentz??? Inviting people??? To his house??¿¿¿

RestInPete: guys

NoWay: is everything alright?

RestInPete: yes everything is okay I just need you all here 

BreadBag: I'm not into orgies like that man

JishINTENSIFIED: we all know that's bullshit Brendon you'd love to be in a nine boy fuck fest 

[BreadBag has changed the group name to "9 Boy Fuck Fest"]

TylerBell: yeah you already are in a threesome with Ryan and Dallon

Weekely: ?? What are you guys talking about Brendon is my best friend 

Weekely: I'd never fuck him that'd be too weird

Frankenfurter: OH

TylerBell: OHMYGOD

JishINTENSIFIED: BRENDON WHAT DID YOU DO

NoWay: BreadBag just got #rekt

BreadBag: what about yesterday Dallon?

Weekely: you mean when I came over to watch TV with you and Ryan? You were acting real weird that night are you sick bud?

TylerBell: OH 

TylerBell: THE SALT 

BreadBag: we'll see about that when we are at Pete's 

RestInPete: no fucking at my house

Weekely: I wouldn't do that. Gross

Weekely: no offence Brendon but you're too much like a brother to me friend 

TylerBell: DALLON STOP IM HAVING A HEARTATTACK IM IN LOVE

 

[1:22 PM]

Frankenfurter: PETE I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU MADE US ALL COME HERE ACTING LIKE IT WAS URGENT

TylerBell: don't be upset I'm living for this Brallon drama rn

IamHalsey: BRALLON DRAMA? WAIT WHAT DID I MISS 

TylerBell: DALLON IS MAD BUT WE DON'T KNOW WHY AND HAS BEEN ACTING LIKE BRENDON'S "BRO" FOR THE LAST HOUR

JishINTENSIFIED: Tyler ur my bro right

TylerBell: ye

[TylerBell has changed their name to BROSEPH]

BROSEPH: I love you man

BROSEPH: As bros of course bro. Bro-ing it up homie

[JishINTENSIFIED has changed their name to HOMIEDUN]

HOMIEDUN: I love you too bro. 

IamHalsey: wait theres too much happening I need explanation

RestInPete: I'm here taking questions

IamHalsey: first off when did Tyler and Josh start acting so gay?

RestInPete: it's worse when you're with them in person 

TYLERBROSEPH: I think u mean better

IamHalsey: why did you invite everyone over to your house??

RestInPete: 2 hang

Frankenfurter: I'm leaving

IamHalsey: update on Brallon situation?

RestInPete: well Brendon just tried to sit next to Dallon and Dallom scooted over saying they needed to "leave room for God"

IamHalsey: God bless u Pete 

RestInPete: I gotcha fam


	47. HOMODUN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Josh goes from HOMIEDUN to HOMODUN
> 
> Tyler goes from TYLERBROSEPH to TYLERHOESEPH

[3:45 PM]

TYLERBROSEPH: guys my mom thinks I'm at a secret cult meeting and not with all of you at Pete's house watching Gerard try to make a tire swing out of a curtain cord and multiple frisbees

Frankenfurter: to be honest I wouldn't believe you either unless I was here

BreadBag: just send her a pic of us doing gay shit I'm sure it'll ease her worries

Weekely: Too bad I can't be in the picture I'm not even gay guys

RyanSauce: DALLON BRENDON IS GOING TO HANG HIMSELF IF YOU DONT STOP

Weekely: Why is he upset about something? Brendon bud, you can always talk to me if you're having troubles

TYLERBROSEPH: Seriously guys what do I do tho

NoWay: Send her a pic of you and Josh making out 

TYLERBROSEPH: she would probably scream so loud we'd hear it from here

Frankenfurter: WHY WAS YOUR ONLY PROBLEM NOT THE PROSPECT OF KISSING HIM, BUT OF UPSETTING YOUR MOM

TYLERBROSEPH: I mean have you seen Josh? I wouldn't exactly refuse

HOMIEDUN: Tyler please I'm sitting right next to you don't be such a tease 

TYLERBROSEPH: as bros of course. Bro attraction yeah? 

[HOMIEDUN has changed their name to HOMODUN]

HOMODUN: nah

TYLERBROSEPH: alright

[TYLERBROSEPH has changed their name to TYLERHOESEPH]

HOMODUN: ;)

TYLERHOESEPH: (;

TYLERHOESEPH: so anyways guys what do I do about my mom? 

BreadBag: so 

BreadBag: we all just gonna ignore that or

TYLERHOESEPH: GERARD GET OFF ME 

NoWay: JUST MAKE OUT ALREADY MY GOD

Weekely: must be nice 

BreadBag: DALLON I SWEAR


	48. Worth it

[8:16 AM]

BreadBag: WHAT CLASS IS EVERYONE IN

Frankenfurter: Ryan and I are in History 

Stumped: I'm in math with Pete and Frank

Weekely: philosophy w/ Josh but he's been "in the bathroom" the whole period 

TYLERHOESEPH: free period

Weekely: oh so he's with you?

[TYLERHOESEPH sent an image to the chat]  
(Selfie of him and Josh in the hallway)

TYLERHOESEPH: ye

BreadBag: EVERYONE GET THEIR ASSES DOWN TO THE CLUB ROOM ASAP

TYLERHOESEPH: on our way

Frankenfurter: I'll ask to go to the bathroom what are you going to do Ryan?

RyanSauce: die

RyanSauce: I'll just say I need to go to the library to do research or something 

RestInPete: somehow I don't think the teacher is gonna let me, Patrick, AND Gerard out

NoWay: I got this, Patrick stick your legs out in front of your desk

Stumped: okay

RestInPete: What are you doing 

RestInPete: WHAT THE FUCK

TYLERHOESEPH: are you guys okay?

TYLERHOESEPH: ...

TYLERHOESEPH: guys

TYLERHOESEPH: DO U NEED ASSISTANCE

NoWay: we out

RestInPete: I CANNOT BELEIVE

RestInPete: GERARD JUST PRETENDED TO TRIP OVER PATRICK'S LEGS AND LANDED ON MY DESK SO THE TEACHER WOULD MAKE US "TAKE HIM TO THE NURSE"

NoWay: worth it


	49. MilkBag

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beautiful comment section as always

[8:45 AM] 

BreadBag: PETE COME BACK

RestInPete: NO YOU ARE LITERALLY SO STUPID YOU MILK BAG

BreadBag: listen I know you're upset so I'm gonna let that slide 

BreadBag: PETE PLEASE

RestInPete: BRENDON YOU JUST MADE US ALL SKIP CLASS TO COME TO THE CLUB ROOM ACTING LIKE IT WAS A BIG DEAL

BreadBag: IT IS A BIG DEAL

RestInPete: YOU ASKED FOR US TO DO YOUR HOMEWORK FOR YOU

BreadBag: PETE PLEASE AFTER YOU LEFT TYLER AND JOSH LEFT

RestInPete: Good that means they have brains

BreadBag: or are going to give each other brain heyo 

HOMODUN: THIS IS WHY WE LEFT

RestInPete: GERARD FRANK RYAN DALLON PATRICK ARE ALL STILL THERE??

NoWay: Frank won't let me follow the OTP

Stumped: Brendon is our friend I gotta help

Stumped: Tyler my guy I could use some help though

HOMODUN: EXCUSE U FEDORA BOY TYLER IS MY GUY

Stumped: um

TYLERHOESEPH: Sorry Patrick I don't even do my homework why would J do Brendon's?

Weekely: I'm just here for my friend 

BreadBag: DALLON IT'S BEEN THREE DAYS GET OVER IT

Frankenfurter: what even happened?

BreadBag: it's so stupid

RyanSauce: Brendon ate Dallon's frenchfries while he was in the bathroom

Frankenfurter: Really? This mad over French Fries

TYLERHOESEPH: hey man I don't blame him I'd be pissed too

NoWay: ahahaha 

Weekely: yeah it's real funny that's why I'm not even mad at my buddy 

Weekely: friendo

BreadBag: I ALREADY SAID IM SORRY

Weekely: SORRY DOESN'T BRING BACK FRIES BRENDON


	50. Sausage Boi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapters inspiration came heavily from the comments thank

[9:28 AM]

BreadBag: LOOK I GOT ALL MY HOMEWORK DONE AND IT'S ALL THANKS TO MY ONLY REAL FRIEND PATRICK

RestInPete: Ahahahhaha

BreadBag: we're best friends now right Patrick

RestInPete: AHAHAHAHAHHA no

Stumped: I don't think I'm allowed Brendon

RyanSauce: I was helping too

BreadBag: thank you Patrick 

RyanSauce: wow rude I will fight 

BreadBag: what are you gonna do throw hair product at me?

RyanSauce: yeah you need it 

TYLERHOESEPH: OHHHH BURN 

Frankenfurter: Tyler you can't just yell burn every time someone insults someone else

TYLERHOESEPH: I CAN AND I WILL SAUSAGE BOI

Frankenfurter: exCUSE ME

HOMODUN: OH NAME BURN

Frankenfurter: SHUT UP SHOULDN'T YOU TWO BE MAKING OUT

NoWay: Yes please do that 

RyanSauce: Gerard you are like their #1 supporter

NoWay: yeah man Joshler all the way

[NoWay has changed their name to AllTheWay]

TYLERHOESEPH: Joshler..?

HOMODUN: oh my god


	51. A geese goose

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Passionate

[2:26 AM]

AllTheWay: why do people say "I'm a people person" and why does it make so much sense?

Frankenfurter: Gee it's literally 2:30 go to sleep

AllTheWay: no like if it was anything else it wouldn't make sense

Frankenfurter: Gerard I'm serious you gotta sleep

AllTheWay: like 

AllTheWay:: I'm a geese goose

AllTheWay: that makes no sense 

Frankenfurter: what

RyanSauce: what

Weekely: what

TYLERHOESEPH: u right 

HOMODUN: Tyler don't encourage him

AllTheWay: like people isn't an adjective why do we use it as one but only in that context

Stumped: is this what insomnia does to people?

BreadBag: no

BreadBag: this is what drugs do to people 

AlllTheWay: you would know

TYLERHOESEPH: OH BURN

BreadBag: TYLER THAT'S NOT EVEN A BURN IT'S JUST TRUE

Stumped: uh oh

RyanSauce: What?

Stumped: Pete's up

RestInPete: DID YOU ALL SERIOUSLY WAKE ME UP TO DISCUSS THE USE OF THE WORD PEOPLE

AllTheWay: yes. 

RestInPete: ..

RestInPete: I

RestInPete: I wasn't expecting a straightforward answer. 

HOMODUN: Hey Patrick how did you know Pete was awake before he even sent anything?

TYLERHOESEPH: HOLY FRICK

BreadBag: DRAMA IN THE PETERICK FAMILY

BreadBag: Sorry. Not a family. 

BreadBag: gross

[RestInPete has removed themself from the chat]

RyanSauce: UM

[RyanSauce has added RestInPete to the chat]

RestInPete: WE'RE JUST HANGING OUT LEAVE ME ALONE

BreadBag: At 2:30 in the morning? 

Stumped: yeah like a sleepover

BreadBag: yeah a /sleep/ over 

Stumped: I don't understand 

Stumped: OH

Stumped: OH NO 

Stumped: THATS NOT WHAT I MEANT 

RestInPete: You're just making it worse Trick give up

TYLERHOESEPH: TRICK

HOMODUN: NICKNAME DETECTED


	52. Bad Vibes

[5:45 AM]

RyanSauce: someone give me one good fucking reason we are all meeting at Walmart at 5 in the fucking morning 

BreadBag: Because you love me

RyanSauce: I will strangle you

HOMODUN: IM KINKSHAMING

RyanSauce: SHUT THE FUCK UP THATS NOT WHAT I MEANT

Weekely: Josh didn't Tyler call you daddy yesterday?

TYLERHOESEPH: ;)

HOMODUN: (;

Frankenfurter: you guys I miss when Josh passionately denied any relationships with anyone

AllTheWay: I DONT. I FUCKING THRIVE ON THIS 

RestInPete: No but seriously Brendon you gotta stop making us go places without telling us details 

RestInPete: If you were a psychopath we'd all already be dead

Stumped: what a dark train of thought

RestInPete: Yeah well it's true

Weekely: You guys better stop arguing or I'm dropping you off on the highway

RestInPete: WHY ARE YOU TEXTING WHILE DRIVING

Weekely: OH LIKE YOU'RE ONE TO TALK

Weekely: I WILL TURN THIS CAR AROUND 

Frankenfurter: Gerard and I are here

AllTheWay: IM GETTING CORNFLAKES

TYLERHOESEPH: why cornflakes

HOMODUN: there is so much better cereal

TYLERHOESEPH: cornflakes are so bland I'm all about the sugar

HOMODUN: same

RyanSauce: gross

TYLERHOESEPH: Ryan you perv we were talking about cereal

AlltheWay: Keep your bad vibes out of my cornflakes


	53. Debate

[6:02 AM]

RestInPete: Halsey

RestInPete: Halsey if you don't get these you're going to be real fucking pissed later on

IamHalsey: here

RestInPete: come to Walmart 

IamHalsey: what

RestInPete: We're going camping tell your parents

IamHalsey: we're camping at Walmart?

RestInPete: no we're buying food and essentials from Walmart

AllTheWay: why do they put food and essentials under different categories?

Weekely: What

Stumped: what

Frankenfurter: what

RestInPete: here we go. Gerard you already had your geese rant don't start

TYLERHOESEPH: no I get what he's saying

TYLERHOESEPH: Like food is pretty essential. 

AllTheWay: but not like, Oreos

TYLERHOESEPH: I wouldn't necessarily say that

AllTheWay: why so?

TYLERHOESEPH: like if you had anxiety and if Oreos were the only thing that could calm you down, then they'd be essential 

AllTheWay: Yeah you're right. Which means that what's essential comes down to a bias

TYLERHOESEPH: yeah and if it comes down to a bias then how can they even label anything an essential item because it varies from person to person 

AllTheWay: I don't know. I'm still getting cornflakes though 

TYLERHOESEPH: Jish can we get Cinnamon Toast Crunch?

HOMODUN: yea 

BreadBag: uh

RyanSauce: so that was

Frankenfurter: did we just witness a debate between two people going by names that are word play off their names

TYLERHOESEPH: rhymes aren't word play. Just rhymes. 

Frankenfurter: oh excuse me

TYLERHOESEPH: ur excused


	54. Big feet

[7:55 AM]

IamHalsey: GUYS WE'VE BEEN AT WALMART FOREVER CAN WE GO

BreadBag: IM NOT DONE GETTING CAMPING STUFF

RyanSauce: BRENDON MACARONI IS NOT A CAMPING NEED

BreadBag: SHUT THE FUCK UP

IamHalsey: so is everyone else ready?

TYLERHOESEPH: I forgot my shoes at my house

RestInPete: HOW

HOMODUN: I have extra shoes in my car

RestInPete: ...Why?

HOMODUN: u never kno when you'll need some shoes 

RestInPete: I guess 

Frankenfurter: Me and Gee are almost done we're paying

Weekely: technically it'd be "Gee and I"

Frankenfurter: Gee and die

Weekely: oh

TYLERHOESEPH: Josh your shoes are too big for me

TYLERHOESEPH: I'll still wear them tho

HOMODUN: u know what they say about people with big feet 

AllTheWay: I just

AllTheWay: you two

AllTheWay: I'm going to die


	55. Unnecessary Petedate

[8:27 AM]

BreadBag: we're all on the road yeah?

IamHalsey: Pete

RestInPete: Halsey you saw me five minutes ago don't ask me for an update

IamHalsey: please? 

Stumped: #Petedate

RestInPete: oh my godddd

RestInPete: You are in the car with Brendon and Ryan 

RestInPete: Dallon is driving Patrick and I, and Frank is driving Gerard Josh and Tyler

Frankenfurter: Yeah and they won't fucking shut up 

Frankenfurter: next time we are separating Gerard and Tyler they've been talking about the relevance of a microwave the entire time 

HOMODUN: EYES ON THE ROAD IF I DIE IN THIS CAR IM COMING BACK TO HAUNT BRENDON

BreadBag: why me

BreadBag: u just wanna see me naked

HOMODUN: No one wants to see you naked 

BreadBag: I think I know two people that would beg to differ

IamHalsey: even I have to admit the whole Brallon/ Ryden thing is confusing me 

Weekely: he's my friend

BreadBag: DALLON I ALREADY APOLOGISED 

Weekely: funnily enough, apologising didn't get me more french fries 

BreadBag: after we get back from camping I'll get you more fries okay 

Stumped: a modern day hero


	56. They stole a fridge

[8:42 AM]

IamHalsey: hey where did Frank's car go?

IamHalsey: Pete are they still behind you guys? 

RestInPete: no 

Stumped: Frank where u at

Frankenfurter: Josh and Tyler made me stop at the store 

IamHalsey: WE WERE LITERALLY JUST AT WALMART FOR LIKE THREE HOURS

RestInPete: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY MADE YOU. YOU'RE DRIVING

Frankenfurter: THEY THREATENED TO JUMP OUT OF THE MOVING CAR 

Frankenfurter: YOU KNOW THEY'D DO IT TOO IM NOT ABOUT TO GET SUED 

IamHalsey: What are they even getting?

TYLERHOESEPH: Redbull 

AllTheWay: Tyler get me one 

TYLERHOESEPH: copy

Frankenfurter: STOP ENCOURAGING IT.

Frankenfurter: IF YOU TWO AREN'T OUT HERE IN 2 MINUTES IM LEAVING WITHOUT YOU

HOMODUN: yes mom

AllTheWay: I see them

AllTheWay: um

Frankenfurter: WHY DO YOU HAVE A MINIFRIDGE. WHY ARE YOU RUNNING

TYLERHOESEPH: JUST DRIVE. WE'L FILL YOU IN LATER JUST GO


	57. Y'all

[8:45 AM] 

RestInPete: TYLER 

RestInPete: JOSH

RestInPete: I CANNOT BELEIVE YOU TWO STOLE A MINIFRIDGE 

TYLERHOESEPH: yeah me neither dude

HOMODUN: It was an act of impulse 

RestInPete: Y'all are so lucky Dallon is driving you know he'd be yelling at you 

TYLERHOESEPH: Y'ALL

HOMODUN: Y'ALL

AllTheWay: Y'ALL

RestInPete: You have to spend five days with me I'd refrain from the BULLYING

Stumped: yeah 

Stumped: Y'all better be careful 

RestInPete: PATRICK


	58. Dallon tops

[9:15 AM]

Weekely: we arent making anymore unnecessary stops after this right guys

Weekely: I will not hesitate to leave without you

Stumped: IM SORRY I HAD TO PEE

Weekely: YOU SHOULD'VE GONE BEFORE WE LEFT

HOMODUN: So Frank is the mom and Dallon is the dad?

RestInPete: what's the ship name?

Stumped: Frallon?

Stumped: or Dank

Stumped: Dank 

RestInPete: I'd say technically it'd be Drank

TYLERHOESEPH: so Dallon tops 

IamHalsey: TYLER 

RyanSauce: WHERE DID YOUR INNOCENCE GO

TYLERHOESEPH: I lost it right Josh ;)

HOMODUN: yea in the mall ;)

AllTheWay: FFFFDJDJDJDNJDJDNSMKSKS

Frankenfurter: GERARD YOU CAN'T FLAIL AROUND LIKE THIS YOU'RE GONNA BREAK A WINDOW 

BreadBag: he does tho ;^)

IamHalsey: STOP. THERE IS TOO MUCH TALK ABOUT SEX RN LETS JUST GO


	59. Hella

[9:32 AM]

BreadBag: YEAH HALSEY RYAN AND I ARE THE FIRST ONES HERE SUCK IT

AllTheWay: that's because Ryan was driving 

AllTheWay: also because you guys were in front

Weekely: yeah and you didn't have to stop for a bathroom break

HOMODUN: Or a minifridge break

IamHalsey: how fast can you guys get here 

TYLERHOESEPH: hella

AllTheWay: why

IamHalsey: I not want to be alone with these two for any longer 

BreadBag: wow rude 

RyanSauce: I am #offended

IamHalsey: Brendon you literally played called me maybe on repeat so loud that the people behind us were switching lanes 

BreadBag: a true masterpiece 

BreadBag: I could sing it for you now 

Weekely: we're here. 

IamHalsey: THANK GOD


	60. :^)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brendon does not give a single fuck

[9:45 AM]

BreadBag: patrickkkkkk why are you taking so long getting food from the carrrr

Stumped: Brendon

BreadBag: yeah

Stumped: why is this bag full entirely of vegetables 

Stumped: you didn't even eat vegetables

BreadBag: yeah I do you slutmcfrappe I'm vegan

Stumped: what

[RyanSauce has changed their name to SlutMcFrappe]

Stumped: regardless, why is it mostly carrots??

TYLERHOESEPH: I haven't had a carrot in like three years 

BreadBag: bet you've had Josh's carrot plenty of times :^)

SlutMcFrappe: stop with that face 

BreadBag: :^)

TYLERHOESEPH: why would you call it a carrot? 

BreadBag: it's what I call mine

TYLERHOESEPH: if it's orange go to the hospital please 

[BreadBag has sent an image to the chat]

AllTheWay: okay

AllTheWay: there was NO need

IamHalsey: I was having a good time

IamHalsey: We were all having a good time 

Weekely: Brendon. Does the conversation we had on BOUNDRIES ring ANY BELLS AT ALL

Frankenfurter: I cannot believe I have to spend 5 days with you after this

HOMODUN: I'm going to cry 

TYLERHOESEPH: my eyes are burning remove this filth

BreadBag: :^)


	61. Carrot banter

[11:26 AM]

HOMODUN: Tyler come down from that tree

AllTheWay: a sentence I never thought I'd hear

TYLERHOESEPH: no I refuse to be anywhere close to Brendon after the /incident/

BreadBag: listen you egged me on with your carrot comment

RestInPete: it's not a bad dick don't make him feel bad 

Stumped: B L O C K E D

RestInPete: I didn't mean it like that

BreadBag: thanks Pete :^)

SlutMcFrappe: Brendon I'd literally rather you go back to the Lenny face than keep this up

BreadBag: :^) why

SlutMcFrappe: weird carrot nose looking motherfucker

TYLERHOESEPH: OH GOD DON'T MENTION CARROTS AGAIN RYAN


	62. Conspirise

[12:13 PM]

IamHalsey: alright who's ready for some s'mores

AllTheWay: why the fuck does that word exist 

IamHalsey: what 

AllTheWay: like think about it 

AllTheWay: it has nothing to do with any of the ingredients 

AllTheWay: ITS NOT LIKE IT'S AN ACRONYM 

AllTheWay: WHY DO WE ALL SAY IT WITHOUT KNOWING WHAT IT MEANS

Frankenfurter: can we not

TYLERHOESEPH: holy shit dude

BreadBag: put on your tin foil hat Gerard we can conspirise later 

BreadBag: for now just focus on the sugary goodness :^)

HOMODUN: Listen I just got Tyler out of the tree don't start being creepy again Brendon

Weekely: is conspirise even a word?


	63. FIGHTFIGHTFIGHT

[12:39 PM] 

AllTheWay: THOSE WERE SOME GREAT CARDBOARD SANDWICHES 

AllTheWay: SHIT

AllTheWay: I MEANT GRAHAM CRACKER

RestInPete: HOW

RestInPete: HOW DID YOU POSSIBLY MIX THOSE TWO UP 

AllTheWay: GREAT MARSHMALLOW CHOCOLATE GRAHAM CRACKER SANDWICHES

SlutMcFrappe: JUST SAY S'MORE AND SIT DOWN PLEASE

AllTheWay: I REFUSE TO STOOP TO YOUR ILLITERATE NONSENSE

HOMODUN: You literally just said cardboard instead of graham cracker 

TYLERHOESEPH: OH BURN

Weekely: TYLER NOT EVERYTHING IS A BURN

IamHalsey: stOP FIGHTING THIS IS WHY I NEVER CHECK THIS THING

Stumped: guys...

BreadBag: WOW HALSEY WJAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY

Stumped: guys we're all literally sitting within the same twenty feet of each other this looks ridiculous 

HOMODUN: NO TYLER STOP YOU CAN NOT JUST GO CLIMB TREES WHENEVER YOU WANT

Stumped: guys 

[Stumped has sent an image to the chat]  
(All 8 boys and Halsey are on their phones. Josh has Tyler by the sleeve so he won't leave, Brendon is glaring at Halsey over the screen, and Frank is just staring blankly at his phone. The others are angrily typing)

Stumped: do u see how this looks 

AllTheWay: who knew chocolate treats could make everyone so salty

SlutMcFrappe: JUST SAY S'MORE GOD DAMMIT


	64. Poor SlutMcFrappe

[4:38 PM]

SlutMcFrappe: can I ask a fucking question

Weekely: well we are all in the same tent so now would be the time

SlutMcFrappe: that's part of my question

SlutMcFrappe: it's a three part question 

SlutMcFrappe: why are we trying to sleep its four in the afternoon

RestInPete: We've all been awake for two days

SlutMcFrappe: two why are we all in the same tent there are more in the fucking van

RestInPete: Halsey said it'd be like a team building excercise

SlutMcFrappe: and finally this is less of a question and more of threat

SlutMcFrappe: because if whoever has there knee in my back does not remove it, I will fight everyone in here

SlutMcFrappe: WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ONE INJURED 

Frankenfurter: oh poor SlutMcFrappe

BreadBag: That's not my knee :^)

SlutMcFrappe: Brendon I will throw you out of this tent so fast

BreadBag: WHY ME THROW JOSH AND TYLER OUT THEY'RE BASICALLY HAVING SEX

TYLERHOESEPH: WE ARE BRO CUDDLING. ITS FUCKING COLD BREDNOB

BreadBag: .... 

BreadBag: hang on.

[BredBag has changed their name to Brednob]

Brednob: OKAY FIRST OF ALL FUCK YOU

Brednob: SECOND OF ALL YOU A PRACTICALLY IN HIS LAP TYLER

HOMODUN: practically 

TYLERHOESEPH: would you be more comfortable if I got all the way on his lap?

AllTheWay: FUCK YEAH LETS DO THAT. SIGN ME UP

Frankenfurter: GERARD STOP THATS SO CREEPY

Stumped: I cannot believe I'm breathing in this sinful air

[Brednob has changed the group name to SINTENT]


	65. Kinksame

[5:00 pm]

Weekely: Brendon we've all already established that none of us have a problem with throwing you out of the tent 

Weekely: so stop fucking poking me

Brednob: :^) yes daddy

AllTheWay: dADDY

Frankenfurter: GEE YOU JUST COUGHED DIRECTLY ONTO MY FACE 

RestInPete: IM KINK-SHAMING

TYLERHOESEPH: I'm kinksame-ing

AllTheWay: WHAT

Frankenfurter: GERARD STOP YOU CAN'T CHOKE WHEN MY FACE IS LIKE TWO INCHES FROM YOURS IM GONNA DIE

Brednob: why was your face so close in the first place :^)

HOMODUN: OHHHHHHH

TYLERHOESEPH: DRAMMAAAAA

RestInPete: YOU TWO SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU'RE CONSTANTLY TOUCHING EACH OTHER

TYLERHOESEPH: and you've been watching. Pete's a pervert

HOMODUN: #Petevert

TYLERHOESEPH: #Petevert

RestInPete: if anyone is a pervert it's Gerard

AllTheWay: I'm okay with that title 

AllTheWay: EVERY ONE IS JUST CUTE OKAY

TYLERHOESEPH: but Jish and I are the cutest right 

AllTheWay: OTP ALL THE WAY

Frankenfurter: DONT EXCITE HIM TYLER


	66. SleepMcFrappe

[11:27 AM]

SlutMcFrappe: that quite possibly was the worst experience of my life 

Frankenfurter: why. All we did was sleep. 

SlutMcFrappe: NO ALL EVERYONE ELSE DID WAS SLEEP

SlutMcFrappe: I WAS STUCK IN BETWEEN BRENDON WHO KICKS IN HIS SLEEP

SlutMcFrappe: AND DALLON WHO'S BONY ASS SHOULDER WAS DIRECTLY IN MY SIDE

TYLERHOESEPH: Wow you guys even sleep as a threesome

SlutMcFrappe: YOU ARE A DICK

HOMODUN: u are what u eat

AllTheWay: GAHRNSJJJNSN

RestInPete: this trip is really just "realising how gay Tyler and Josh are for each other"

TYLERHOESEPH: GEE GET AWAY FROM ME 

Frankenfurter: if someone would move Halsey off of me I could control Gerard 

Stumped: how is she still asleep didn't I just accidentally kick her 

Brednob: is this why she never answers the group chat?

RestInPete: I wouldn't either if my phone didn't go off every two seconds 

RestInPete: you guys literally kill my battery constantly 

Brednob: I'll recharge it for you :^)

RestInPete: I will not hesitate to leave. I'll take my car with me 

RestInPete: and Patrick

TYLERHOESEPH: aww

RestInPete: SHUT UP TYLER


	67. Sleep assault

[12:15 PM] 

Brednob: Halsey you're finally coming out of the tent

AllTheWay: what are you wearing

IamHalsey: what

RestInPete: how may hoodies is that?

IamHalsey: my style is its cold and I am pissed off

Brednob: at school you dress like you work at a stripclub what are talking about

IamHalsey: and at all other times I'm wearing three hoodies and track shorts 

IamHalsey: why does it bother you

Brednob: no I'm just not used to seeing you with clothes on

IamHalsey: so we've all decided we're leaving Brendon here when we leave right

SlutMcFrappe: right

Brednob: wtf Ryan I thought you loved me 

SlutMcFrappe: I HAVE BRUISES FROM WHERE YOU SLEEP ASSAULTED ME 

Brednob: ITS NOT MY FAULT


	68. WhY

[1:12 PM]

Frankenfurter: why are we going kayaking

Frankenfurter: why did Brendon suggest this

Frankenfurter: why isn't anyone objecting

Frankenfurter: like we're all just agreeing to this?

Frankenfurter: Gerard do you even know how to swim?

Frankenfurter: does anyone know  
How to swim??

Frankenfurter: Why isn't anyone answering wtf guys are you calm about your possible death

[1:21 PM]

Frankenfurter: WHY ARE WE ALL GETTING ON ONE BOAT

Frankenfurter: THIS IS NOT A GOOD IDEA

Frankenfurter: LITERALLY THY ARE NOT MADE TO HOLD THIS MANY PEOPLE WHAT ARE WE DOING

TYLERHOESEPH: Yolo

Frankenfurter: I hate everyone here

Frankenfurter: including myself

HOMODUN: yono

Frankenfurter: I hope we all drown

Frankenfurter: whoever is humming the jaws theme song is about to get slapped


	69. Sinboat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keep suggesting keep being hilarious thank you to everyone

[3:35 PM] 

Brednob: HAHHAHAHA PETE DROPPED HIS PHONE IN THE WATER IM DYING

TYLERHOESEPH: BRENDON U KNOW HE WILL PUSH YOU IN IF HE SEES YOU TALKING SHIT 

Frankenfurter: I have a question

Frankenfurter: weren't you grounded Brendon?

Frankenfurter: why did everyones parents agree to this wtf

Brednob: you obviously underestimate the power of hiding the truth

AllTheWay: you mean lying?

Brednob: no

Brednob: hey mom I'm going on a camping trip with honour students Patrick and Tyler and their friends 

Brednob: that is not a lie 

IamHalsey: I just told them you all were gay af and they didn't care

IamHalsey: somebody kiss and then I'll take a pic and prove it to them 

AllTheWay: I VOLUNTEER TYLER AND JOSH FOR THIS 

HOMODUN: I don't perform under pressure

Frankenfurter: somebody get me off of this 

[Brednob has changed the group name to Sinboat]


	70. Finna

[5:02 PM]

SlutMcFrappe: THERE ARE MOSQUITOS EVERYWHERE

SlutMcFrappe: CAN WE PLEASE GET OUT OF THE WATER

Weekley: WE ALL WANT TO LEAVE RYAN

Weekely: EVERYONE EXCEPT BRENDON

IamHalsey: why are we letting him control the boat. Let's push him out and go without him

Brednob: WOW FUCK YOU HALSEY ILL CRAWL ACROSS THIS KAYAK TO BEAT YOUR ASS

IamHalsey: gotta say that's the strangest threat I've ever recieved 

Brednob: finna beat your ass with a paddle

SlutMcFrappe: KINK

Weekely: fINNA 

TYLERHOESEPH: kinkSAME 

Stumped: my pure mind can not handle your sin Brendon

Frankenfurter: DID YOU JUST SAY FINNA

AllTheWay: FINNA LIKE THE FINS ON THE SHARKS THAT ARE GONNA EAT YOU FOR THAT FUCKING S I N

Brednob: finna taste good

Brednob: taste the rainbow

Frankenfurter: now I really hope we all drown my fucking god


	71. PROTECT THE CHILDREN

[8:15 PM]

Brednob: Dude

Brednob: buttholes could be like pockets 

Brednob: like thats why prisoners hide stuff up there 

Brednob: they're just ahead of the game

Weekely: no they are not

Weekely: do not do that

SlutMcFrappe: what the fuck Brendon you said you were going to the car for food an hour ago

HOMODUN: Why don't we just bring all the food at once so we can stop making trips

AllTheWay: what about bears Josh

HOMODUN: We are on a campsite. Like we didn't just set up in the woods randomly. 

HOMODUN: everyone does realise that right. Like there is zero chance of that. 

AllTheWay: anythings possible if u believe 

HOMODUN: imma have to disagree 

Frankenfurter: seriously though Brendon why are you taking so long

Brednob: :^)

Weekely: OH GOD

SlutMcFrappe: I wish we'd never asked 

TYLERHOESEPH: I don't understand 

Stumped: yea wait what's happening 

IamHalsey: PROTECT THE CHILDREN


	72. French Toast

[1:32 AM]

AllTheWay: 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon  
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg  
2 tablespoons sugar  
4 tablespoons butter  
4 eggs  
1/4 cup milk  
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract  
8 slices challah, brioche, or white bread  
1/2 cup maple syrup, warmed

Frankenfurter: what

AllTheWay: a small bowl, combine, cinnamon, nutmeg, and sugar and set aside briefly.

IamHalsey: uh

IamHalsey: Gerard you are aware that it's past one in the morning

AllTheWay: In a 10-inch or 12-inch skillet, melt butter over medium heat. Whisk together cinnamon mixture, eggs, milk, and vanilla and pour into a shallow container such as a pie plate. Dip bread in egg mixture. Fry slices until golden brown, then flip to cook the other side. Serve with syrup.

Frankenfurter: What is this a recipe for and why was it necessary 

AllTheWay: Shut the fuck up

AllTheWay: It's French Toast


	73. No petedate

[1:41 AM]

Frankenfurter: GUys please help Gerard keeps reciting breakfast recipes 

Frankenfurter: HOW DOES HE HAVE THEM ALL MEMORIZED 

SlutMcFrappe: I'm so glad we're not all in the same tent anymore 

IamHalsey: why you don't want to be woken up by Gerard whispering pancake ingredients?

IamHalsey: by the way where is everybody situated 

Stumped: oh no

Stumped: PETE CAN'T DO A PETEDATE BECAUSE HIS PHONE IS IN THE WATER 

IamHalsey: GUYS YOU ALL GPTTA COME THROUGH. STAY STRONG WOTHOUT PETE

Brednob: Dallon and Ryan and I are in a tent :^)

SlutMcFrappe: not for very much longer if you keep doing that face

Stumped: I'm in with Pete but he's asleep

TYLERHOESEPH: Jish 

IamHalsey: wait so everyone is with their ships?

IamHalsey: why was I put in with Gerard and Frank?

Frankenfurter: feel free to leave at anytime 

IamHalsey: I'm going to Tyler and Josh's tent 

AllTheWay: RECORD YOUR EXPERIENCE 

AllTheWay: RECORD EVERYTHING

IamHalsey: GOD GERARD YOU'RE WORSE THAN BRENDON

AllTheWay: THEY ARE JUST SO 

AllTheWay: AGH

TYLERHOESEPH: so agh?

Frankenfurter: I'm going to throw your phone in the lake with Pete's if you can't control yourself Gee

AllTheWay: Halsey I'll give you twenty bucks 

IamHalsey: deal


	74. #JoshlerConfirmed

[2:27 PM]

Frankenfurter: GERARD CALM DOWN WHATS GOING ON

FRANKENFURTER: WHY IS GERARD HYPERVENTILATING WHERE IS EVERYONE

HOMODUN: IT WAS AN ACCIDENT 

Frankenfurter: WHAT WAS

Brednob: TYLER AND JOSH KISSED 

HOMODUN: BRENDON PUSHED TYLER INTO ME AND WE ACCIDENTALLY KISSED

AllTheWay: OHMYGOD #JOSHLER

AllTheWay: #JOSHLERCONFIRMED

HOMODUN: IT WAS AN ACCIDENT IT WASNT EVEN A REAL KISS

TYLERHOESEPH: wow rude 

HOMODUN: tYLER 

Brednob: #JOSHLERCONFIRMED

IamHalsey: #JOSHLERCONFIRMED

HOMODUN: NO ITS NOT YOU ASSHATS 

TYLERHOESEPH: WHAT IS JOSHLER 

Stumped: this whole thing is a mess

Frankenfurter: GERARD PLEASE CALM DOWN

AllTheWay: JOSH AND TY SITTING IN A TREE

TYLERHOESEPH: I'm down

HOMODUN: aight

[TYLERHOESEPH and HOMODUN have left the chat]

SlutMcFrappe: no way

Brednob: WHERE ARE THEY 

AllTheWay: OHMYGOD

Frankenfurter: GERARD PLEASE

[Weekely has added TYLERHOESEPH and HOMODUN to the chat]

Weekely: ????

TYLERHOESEPH: ;)

TYLERHOESEPH: I'm jk we're getting chips

Brednob: GOD DAMMIT GUYS


	75. King of the gays

[3:15 PM]

Brednob: now that Josh and Tyler are engaged 

HOMODUN: we're not engaged 

Brednob: omg u guys could have a forest wedding

SlutMcFrappe: Brendon if this is how you die I'm not even going to care

HOMODUN: You're the one who pushed Tyler into me Brendon

Brednob: don't pretend you didn't like it

HOMODUN: Regardless, it was still an accident 

AllTheWay: R E G A R D L E S S

Brednob: YOU ARE SO GAY I SWEAR TO GOD JOSH

HOMODUN: yeah I am and so are you. And so is everyone else here

IamHalsey: I'm pan 

Stumped: Pete is too 

HOMODUN: everyone is slightly gay 

HOMDUN: and Brendon is king of the gays 

Brednob: MY FIRST DECLERATION IS THAT THERE BE A JOSHLER WEDDING HELD AT ONCE

SlutMcFrappe: YOU SPELLED DECLARATION WRONG YOU DUMBASS 

Brednob: second D E C L A R A T I O N is that Ryan be fed to the bears. 

HOMDUN: THERE ARE NO BEARS HERE OH MY GOD


	76. What did I just write

[3:47 PM] 

Brednob: EVERYONE GATHER AROUND THE CAMPFIRE ITS TIME FOR JOSH TO SAY HIS VOWS

HOMODUN: LET IT GO 

SlutMcFrappe: who's flower girl?

Frankenfurter: Gerard 

AllTheWay: I'm okay with that 

Weekely: Frank should be ring bearer then

Frankenfurter: there are no rings 

AllTheWay: we'll draw them on. Sharpie rings

SlutMcFrappe: does this mean Brendon is priest because I'm pretty sure that's blasphemy 

Brednob: I'm a great priest okay Ryan 

[Brednob has changed their name to FatherUrie] 

Stumped: FATHER

FatherUrie: just call me daddy :^)

HOMODUN: GUYS STOP

HOMODUN: DON'T MAKE TYLER UNCOMFORTABLE 

TYLERHOESEPH: I'm chill

AllTheWay: AHHHHHGHHHHH YES

[AllTheWay has changed their name to FlowerGirard]

Frankenfurter: why does that fit so well

FlowerGirard: BECAUSE JOSHLER WEDDING WAS MEANT TO BE HELP OH MY GOD I CAN'T BREATH

HOMODUN: I mean I'm good if Tyler's good

TYLERHOESEPH: bro

[TYLERHOESEPH has changed their name to TylerMatrimoseph]

HOMODUN: bro

[HOMODUN has changed their name to BrideDun]

BrideDun: I couldn't think of a pun 

Brednob: Josh why are you the girl you're definitely the top

TylerMatrimoseph: wow offended 

AllTheWay: AM I DREAMING. IS THIS HAPPENING OH MY GOD

IamHalsey: I've never been more happy to be attending a weeding via Groupchat

FatherUrie: DO YOU JOSH TAKE TYLER IN HOLY MATRIMOSEPH

HOMODUN: I'm down 

Stumped: this wedding is a wreck

FatherUrie: DO YOU TYLER TAKE JOSH TO BE YOUR LAWFULLY WEDDED DUNSBAND

BrideJosh: oh that's good 

[BrideJosh has changed their name to DUNSBAND]

TylerMatrimoseph: I'm down if Josh is down 

FatherUrie: GERARD FRANK QUICK DRAW THE RINGS ON BEFORE THEY CHAMGE THEIR MINDS

Weekely: I cannot believe this just happened


	77. So emotional

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Every comment on this was either very nice or fucking hilarious and I thank you for that even though I didn't reply to anyone because I'm an asshole. Enjoy

[2:30 AM]

FatherUrie: u guys

FatherUrie: it's our last day of camp today

SlutMcFrappe: it is two in the morning Brendon now is not the time

FatherUrie: it is our last day out here together 

Stumped: ... I mean yeah technically but we all go to the same school like why are you like this

FatherUrie: and I think we've all learned a lot on this trip

Frankenfurter: yeah I've learned I hate every single one of you

FatherUrie: things were lost

FlowerGirard: like my dignity 

Stumped: #RIPpetesphone

FatherUrie: things we're discovered 

IamHalsey: yeah like the fact that I didn't know Gerard hated the word S'mores

FlowerGirard: IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE 

FatherUrie: romance blossomed

DUNSBAND: subtle 

FatherUrie: and the goal of this chat has been completed 

TylerMatrimoseph: what was the goal?

FatherUrie: Young Tyler...

TylerMatrimoseph: we are the same age

FatherUrie: let me tell you a tale of long ago...

Weekely: you mean like a month ago?

FatherUrie: back when Josh was a thirsty young space boy with repressed sexual tension 

DUNSBAND: exCUSE ME 

FatherUrie: and gracious Pope Urie took it upon himself to create the glorious phrase that was 

FatherUrie: #GetJoshABoyfriend

IamHalsey: iconic

DUNSBAND: Brendon stop

FatherUrie: and then I added you Tyler 

FatherUrie: and now you're married

Weekely: you skipped some parts but alright I guess

TylerMatrimoseph: wow

FlowerGirard: and thus the OTP was born and THRIVES ON

TylerMatrimoseph: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN

IamHalsey: also

[IamHalsey has sent an image to the chat]  
(Picture from when Halsey was in the Joshler tent. Tyler and Josh are sleeping cuddled with each other)

FlowerGirard: YESSSSSSSS MY GODDDDD HALSEYYYYY YESSSSSS

IamHalsey: where's my $20?

Weekely: yeah that reminds me 

Weekely: Brendon

FatherUrie: yes child

Weekely: WHERE ARE MY FRENCHFRIES BUDDY

Frankenfurter: OH MY GOD

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EDIT: Sorry this just hit 420 kudos and because I'm super immature I was laughing so hard I had to post about it sorry


End file.
